A
female
age
26-29,
*hana4567
writes:There's this guy in school whom I admired (a crush admiration only)..But eventually,i found out that he has anger management issues,so i didn't like him anymore,and so my classmates told me to distance myself a bit from him.But i was afraid that if i didn't respond to him and distance myself, negative things would happen to me (like him punching me or something like that..) so,through IM,although i dont reply to him that much,he admitted that he likes me and immediately asked me out..I guess i only said "yes" out of fear again. So everything i did with him was halfheartedly.After three weeks,my family knew and was very upset with me and requested me to break up with that person. And to myself i think he's not worthy of my pride because i barely even know him..So i broke up with him..But now he's starting to punch walls in school, sending me nonsense letters about wanting to talk to me (i've shown up in one his requests to talk to him but he only says nonsense things,he's just wasting my time), and being too childish..It's making me annoyed, already.I've been ignoring those irritating things for 5 weeks. I already told my parents and they told me to talk to him (which i already did) and they said if he still doesn't leave me alone, they're the ones who'll talk to him. But i don't want my parents to be affected in their schedule, and everything because of my issues with someone, who can't move on. I want to do it by myself,what should i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (1 February 2011):
 Alright, you really should have said no at your first opportunity. By saying yes, you gave him more to lose when things ended, and made things worse. Next time this comes up, keep that in mind. Do not let fear rule you, ever.
It's possible, and worth considering, that you may have actually been attracted to him partly because of his edgy, violent nature. Really think about your motivation for saying "yes" to this guy, so you can avoid that mistake in the future.
Now, keep the letters, tell your family and friends, and don't do it alone. Humanity is where we are today because we work together and build teams, not because everyone ran off and did their own thing. Get some backup and convince him to leave you alone. Legal action should be the last resort, but it may be necesary, so save the phone messages, texts, IM conversations, and letters.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (1 February 2011):
Keep the letters and anything else that he sends, and tell someone what is happening again. Your parents are there to protect you. One day you'll do the same for your kids too. You need to get this guy off your back, so make sure people know.
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