A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my girlfriend that i had for almost 2 years started acting funny for a few days, so i ask what was wrong and she said nothing. she was going to bars after work for 4 hours and not call me or answer the phone. stay at work late and it seemed like she didnt want to be around me.i stoped trusting her and we broke up.2 weeks later she is trying to get me back now, after telling me about the guy a work that she had feelings for befor we broke up, and after we broke up they partied afew times. but she said she did not do any thing with him and she said thats why she started acting funny beacuse he made her feel special. should i trust her, what should i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008): It sounds to me that lust got the better of her as there was something missing from your relationship. If you had trust issues in the first place then you have to ask yourself "will this still be the same " Why put yourself through it again , if there is not trust then their is no relationship
Pinkdally
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (5 June 2008):
 If you feel that the trust between you can be rebuilt, then you can start to work on it with her. It's probably time for a good long honest talk with her. What are your expectations, what are hers?
What went wrong, was it just that she wasn't sure about your relationship or that you were more invested in it than she was?
I'm sorry for having so many questions, but I think you need to be very careful about this.
Just be honest with her and yourself about what you want in a good relationship and then see if what you two had together is worth moving forward with.
All the best.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2008): For her to do something like this just means something is not right in your relationship. And it doesn't mean you did anything wrong but maybe she is not the right girl for you, her head is somewhere else right now. Happens all the time. People grow apart, fall out of love. You can't get back with her if you don't trust her, if you still feel hurt or if you haven't forgiven her, all of which clearly you haven't. You need to stay away from her for now and clear your head and take time to yourself to really judge how you feel about what's happened. You can't do that if you get back with her. Its going to be nothing but resentment and getting back with someone who treated you like that is going to affect your self esteem. I am not saying it has to be over forever between you two, but right now this situation has caused a wedge between you two that I don't think is fixable at this moment, especially not without you both seperating and clearing your heads for a little while. I personally believe in having dignity and being selfish when it comes to things like this. You are SOOOO young, you have no idea. At your age, you DO NOT have to put up with stuff like this cause you are at a perfect age to get hurt and keep your dignity and stand right back up and move on, if in the long run that's what you decide. Don't waste your time letting people walk over you. As a voice of WISDOM, you are going to look back and wished you had done things differently. And do not be mean or resentful about it. Be a complete gentleman and let her know that you are confused and you need time, tell her you are sorry but you can't be with her right now. And be on your own. Time will tell if you are meant to be. If its meant to be you are not going to lose her. So don't worry for now, do not be afraid to walk away. It is really what you need to do.
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