A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend broke up with me because he felt I was too comfortable in the relationship and Those were his own words. In a way I kind of saw where he was coming from, but for the most par lt I don't really understand. He and I always said things like 'I'll always be here for you' and 'I never want to lose you' When he says I got too comfortable in the relationship I don't know what he means and he won't tell me, he doesn't want to talk things out which is really not like him. I guess I was very comfortable with him, but isn't that normal? I haven't stopped making efforts in our relationship or anything, and everything had seemed normal and fine before he broke up with me. I was comfortable to be myself around him and trusted him, and never thought I'd have to worry about what I was doing. Can someone make sense of this?
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female
reader, wrathykins  +, writes (25 March 2016):
 That's a very poor reason to break up with someone! If he won't tell you what he ment by that or give you a real reason, that indicates to me the real reason is NOT good, so I would just draw a line in the sand and forget about him.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (25 March 2016):
 I agree with Ciar,
He wasn't happy and that was the EXCUSE he chose to use when breaking up with you.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (25 March 2016):
 I'll help you interpret this "guy-talk"....
When a guy sez that a girl (you) '... are too comfortable in your(s) relationship..." it REALLY MEANS, "I'm about to break off things with you.... and I don't have a real reason (or, another girl has caught my eye, and I want to try her out...)...."
Good luck....
P.S. This is akin to "... it's not you; it's me..."
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A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (25 March 2016):
 'Too comfortable' suggests to me that he felt taken for granted. That you relied on him never to leave you so you didn't have to make the same effort.
This is not about how many favours you did for him or how much attention you paid him, but how respectful you were (or weren't) of his personal space, need for privacy etc. Since I wasn't there I can't say for certain what you did or didn't do, obviously, but he wasn't happy and was at the point he just wanted out.
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