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male
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*ouknow
writes: So my girlfriend broke with me on May 31. We went out for 2 1/2 years. We would fight for no reason. And my outgoing personality made her jealous. We have kept communication open. We talk at least once a week, whether it's me calling or texting her, or her calling or texting. We have seen each other twice in July and we are both still emotional about things. When I ask if we are going to get back together she says she "doesn't know". And if it does happen it will be in a long time (2 years). I think she has total control of the situation since we talk so frequently and she obviously knows she can have me back. She bought a dog to help with the break up (I am assumming). Should I ignore her calls? I don't want to play games. But after we hang out or talk it seems like a relapse. So I am asking you for your advice. Thank you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2006): I'm going thru the same thing and man it bites! My ex and I still talk and text and hang-out. Take RJgirl's advice because it is good advice. I also need to take it. She does have control and she knows you want her back and you will be at her every call. Find it in yourself to make you feel better and do things for you. If it is meant it will happen. Like susan1982 wrote, you are exes for a reason, thats true but that doesn't mean you can't be a couple again. Just use this break-up time for self betterment. If she loves you she will understand and she will let you work it out. Get control back, not of her but of you. Good Luck.
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reader, susan1982 +, writes (17 July 2006):
i think that you are exes for a reason. there is always something about exes that we feel we cannot let go. i think it is just routine and bceause u r apart it has upset this.
i dont know how old u are but u only live once and life is to short to hold on to loose ends.
try and move on, there is no reason why u cant be friends.hope that helps
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2006): The best thing you can do for yourself right now is move on. There's no use clinging onto a relationship that has ended. Although you both still have feelings, and things could happen down the road, you should try taking some "you" time. Find a hobby, go out with friends, or maybe take a class. Do something that makes you feel good about yourself, without the reassurance of another. Be happy and enjoy your life right now. Whether or not you keep contact with your ex-girlfriend is completely up to you, but keep in mind that it tends to make people a little frustrated and confused. Then again, she might see your new-found love of life and want you back before it's too late! Or, you could meet a cute new girl while trying out your latest hobby. Whatever the case, just try and be happy right now. Don't let her be your main focus. Let yourself be your main focus. Find joy in life. Even if you don't get the girl, I guarantee that you'll feel better.
I wish you the best of luck with your situation. I hope everything works out okay for you in the end. Keep smiling!
~RJGirl
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