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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hi,i have been with my boyfriend for five years now, but we were best friends for about 5 years before that. he has now decided he doesn't want to be with me any more and i don't know what to do.i really can't imagine my life without him, we have always done everything together. he has lots of interests so i doubt he misses me that much. i only have a couple of friends and they are also friends of his, so i feel i can't really talk to them as he will find out what i have said and also i can't face them as they are still friends with him. i know it's wrong but i resent the fact he wants to be friends with them but nothing to do with me.people say make new friends, get new interests but how? i feel so lonely, does anyone have any advice?
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male
reader, lboy  +, writes (1 December 2006):
 hi reader,
i'm not going to tell you to get new friends or interests, i'm going to advice that you trust the friends that you already have and just ask then to keep what you tell them confidential and to not let your ex find out. as for the whole not wanting them to be friends with him, you can't make someone stop being a friend especially not if they have been friends for a long time as that kind of friendship is not easily broken. just try to get over him, read a few books or something, you could take up a hobby like gardening or drawing, you don't need to be good at it rfor it to take your mind of something that you don't like or want to think about, well thats about all i can say.
good luck
lboy
xxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2006): I bet these friends of yours and his will remain your friends too. They will be glad to hear from you. Give one of them a ring tonight but don't say one bad thing about your bloke. Don't go there. Do you have any hobbies? Maybe ask one of these friends out for a drink or go on a shopping trip. If you go college or work then isn't there someone there you can go out with? Five years is a long time but unfortunately we all change and not everything stays the same. You will get your life back on track in time, take things easy, all this won't happen overnight.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, Aunt Charlene +, writes (30 November 2006):
 im sorry about yor dissolution,did he say he doesnt want to be just friends? if so then im afraid you will have to move on.my boyfriends best mate is also my best mate and i feel ican talk to him when things arent that smooth,why not turn to your friends? they may be friends with your ex aswell but they should be there for you,they havent fallen out with you have they?so i would suggest talking to them because as long as your not going to spread terrrible tales about your ex like oh he was no good in bed etc, then i cannot see the harm in actually sharing the problems you will have at this time with friends who know you well.
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