| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: After nearly four years with my girlfriend we split up two years ago. In those two years we didn't see each other at all. Recently we got back in touch and have been getting on very well. She is having a lot of problems at the moment and I am helping her with these. She is single and so am I. The other week she came round to mine for dinner, we ended up sleeping together. Since then we have been in touch nearly every day, but as friends. I want to get back together, but I don't want to scare her off in case she doesn't . . . she says she has lost faith in relationships, having had a bad time of it since we split up. But there does seem to be a spark between us. How can I let her know I want to get back together without scaring her off?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, pops +, writes (24 July 2005):
Send or have delivered her a flower, with a note telling her how much you mean to you, how the renewed relationship has made you happy, and how you would like to make her happy for the rest of her life. If you can use the "L" word comfortable, tell her you love her. She should respond. If she does not want your relationship to grow, so to speak, she will let you know. Then, the air will be clear, and you won't needlessly hurt yourself by carrying a torch for a past lover who has no interest in starting over again. Don't hurt yourself. Talk to her about your renewed feelings, now, before you hurt yourself deeply. Been there, and done that. pops
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