A
male
age
41-50,
*9ways
writes:Hi all.Ex and me was engaged and been together for 5 but had a LDR.ANW she left me two days after she bought her dress for the engagement.I tried everything , even showing up on her door step 3000 miles away with flowers.Nothing.I stopped calling and trying the last few months and I get this.7 months after break up: You are the man of my life , will not find a guy like you.8 months:I hear you are in town, can you come earlier by one day as I travelling abroad alone and want to see you.I said no.9 months:You got a gf right, whats her name, is she there with you?I dont know why i feel this , she said10 months: I got depression, going to the psych, i had b4 i left you, i should had gone before we broke up.You are the only person that knows this.3 weeks now she has disappeared again.Any opinions?
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male
reader, 69ways +, writes (26 November 2011):
69ways is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do want her but cant trust her to be stable again
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2011): To be honest, sounds like she's realised what she's lost. She may believe that if she tries hard enough she will win you back, and if the case is that you want to be won back then by all means carry on. However it seems you have moved on with your life and don't want to be with her any longer. You have to make yourself very clear. Be firm but don't be cruel. I agree with worldlywise. You were with her for 5 years, and engaged and yet the only time you discover her depression is 10 months after you break up? I would be very careful if i were you. Sounds like she's playing you, however unintentionally, and you need to tell her to move on as you have.Good luck.
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A
male
reader, 69ways +, writes (25 November 2011):
69ways is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe understands no stop and cant change my number as i got it for wokl also
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2011): Blimey what a confusing situation. I would ignore the messages, she made her choice months ago and is just playing with your emotions.
I would take the depression with a pinch of salt too, she seems to like dramatic statements. Attention seeking maybe when she's bored or alone...If she wanted to get back with you she would be more forthright.But she seems to know you that your still emotionally not over her and plays on it.
Either tell her to stop contacting you as your over her and have moved on or ignore her and delete her messages without reading them. Change your number and block her emails.
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A
female
reader, iloveblue  +, writes (25 November 2011):
 Looks like your gf has realized what she has lost and is now going through a roller coaster of emotions accepting that you've moved on. People can't help it sometimes. It happened to me, I was starting a promising relationship when my ex started getting in touch with me again. Saying things like " So you have a bf now, can we meet up for coffee?" then shows up by stalking me at my house and says he misses me, attempts a physical contact which i rejected. Then disappears the next week, appears again another week. Been there!
My advise, do not be fooled with these kinds of tactics. These people want to drag us to their loss and would want us to participate in their misery. Your ex and my ex left and it was their choice. Believe me it's a waste of time and not worth for you to even set aside one second to think about her. You are doing good now and having another potential relationship. Why spoil it for someone who broke your heart? She's past, put her in the past. She's toxic to your stable condition now, never ever look back.
I suggest that the next time she contacts you, tell her you have moved on and don't want anything to do with her. Ignore future messages or calls from her, block her.
You have pulled yourself away from that rubble, why go back again?
Best of luck to you.
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