A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i am in a relationship with a 21 year old guy, and im only 16, i had kept this away from my parents but one night they heard me talking on the phone with him, and they asked my sisters who it was and they told my dad i had a 21 year old boyfriend. he said he was going to press charges on him, can someone please help me? i really love him, thank you Reply to this Question
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (24 July 2010):
 Your Dad is upset because you are dating an older man. As a man himself, he knows that 21 year old men are interested in 16 year old girls for certain reasons! You have to understand that he is angry because he loves you and that is no bad thing! If you are not sexually active with him then there is no reason to worry about the law. Even if you are, there is limited opportunity for prosecution if you refuse to cooperate with law authorities by being a witness to a crime. If the age of consent is 16, you have passed that. If the age of consent is 18, the law enforcement agencies would have to prove that sexual activity has taken place for a start. It would be hard to do that without witnesses (meaning you). I hope that you are not sexually active with this man though. The reason is that if you are not you can determine if he likes you for 'you', or as a younger girl to have sex with who lacks experience. Take care because it maybe great to have an older boyfriend who has money, cars etc, but he may not turn out to be who you think he is.
A
female
reader, blue_eyes1981 +, writes (24 July 2010):
 If this guy has touched you in any way at all even if you let him, legally you don't have the right to consent to any sexual activity with a man who is over the age of consent as this guy certainly is.
Basically this guy can be charged with statutory rape if anything has happened between you two.
The age of consent is there for a reason - this guy knew you were only 16 he knew the danger he should have not came anywhere near you.
I'm sorry but this is a decision that is down to your parents. You claim to love him and at your age this guy is probably your whole world but let it go let him go just trust your parents.
I'm sure your Father will not have charges brought against him if you agree to end the relationship but you must end it. No meeting in secret or anything like that you have to walkaway - if you don't and you are found out and believe me you will be found out - then I'm sure your Father will follow through with his original course of action.
Your boyfriend will go to jail and will be registered as a sex offender essentially you will have ruined so many aspects of this guys life if you allow that to happen.
When you are 18 find someone else right now just leave the whole thing well alone - it is really all you can do without lives being destroyed - your own included.
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A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom +, writes (24 July 2010):
 What is the age of consent? Because if you are over it and have been since you got together, then he can't be punished as he has committed no crime. However, maybe you need to talk to your parents and tell them that you have been responsible. Maybe you should suggest that they meet your boyfriend to see what he's like before deciding whether to press charges or not.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 July 2010):
 You can help him by staying away. Legally in some states HE can get in serious trouble, such as being labelled as a sex offender. THAT label will follow him for the REST OF HIS LIFE! Which mean he will have trouble getting a decent job anywhere.
If you two love each other he will wait for you to turn 18.
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