A
female
age
41-50,
*omoffour
writes:i've been with my husband for 12 years married for 10 years we have 4 children. I come from a filipino family and it is our tradition that we take care of our parents. my husband and i have been living with my parents for the last 4 years while he is finishing up his master degree. They have been paying rent and we have been paying utilities. now that he is finished with school he does not want my parents to live with us anymore,my parents are in their 60's and have several health problems, i can honestly say they have not always been on the best of terms, my husband feels that he is not respected. he is causing my stress because although i love my parents i just don't want to throw them out. i feel like my husband has used my parents to get to where he is at and now since he doesn't need them he wants to get rid them. what should i do?? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Uncle Trev  +, writes (28 July 2007):
It is not as if your parents are making things difficult. I could imagine your husband being difficult if they were always finding fault with him and no matter what he did they disliked him but this is not the case. Your parents sound like very pleasant people so it seems like it should be up to your husband to pull rank and make more of an effort. Surely when he married you he would have known about your culture and knew that this would have been the proceedure you would both be expected to follow. I could understand your husbands objections if your parents had abused you or the both of you somehhow but even that doesn't seem to be the case here. He has been able to sit a masters degree through their help by what you have written so surely having them both on board now they need the help would be a nice way that he could say thank you to them. I must admit I am with you on this one as it seems to be your husband who is doing most of the taking and none of the giving.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2007): Whatever happens. They are your parents.They raised you. Were always there for you. They gave you life.
Dont turn your back on them when they need you most. Especially because of a selfish husband.
Your parents are only here once. Just like we are.
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