A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I use to have a crush on a guy at work until I found out about his girlfriend. I thought the attraction was mutual but I decided to let it go because he was hot and cold and maybe I was reading into things. Anyway they got married a few months ago and I've noticed things. One day he stood next to me but then I'll move away because I felt he was as too close, and then he moved by me again. Each time I moved he inched toward me. We don't have conversations he'll just move near. He's sneaky because our co workers are around Ocassionally look at me orbtry make eye contact or smile from afar.Walking down the hall I passed his room and he was standing outside when I heard him say YO. There was no one else around so I looked at him to see who he was talking to. He was looking straight ahead and had an odd look on his face light he was containing himself from laughter. It felt like he was catcalling me or something. You see I've been ignoring him and barely say good morning to him anymore. I've cut all dealings with him since he got married. We've never dated nor slept together ever! Never will far as I'm concerned. He has also leaned back in the direction I was walking in, I was walking by again, and he kept leaning backwards as I walked by with his face towards me. I glanced in the room opposite of him to see if he was looking in there at something. There was nothing of note happening in there at all. He has tried speaking to me or make me laugh but I keep things dry and professional.What's his deal now?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 January 2015):
 Since he has a rather flawed moral compass, you will have to "act" like the grown up with good sense here. Which mean you IGNORE the asshat.
I still say the guy is an "attention-whore"- and if he KNOWS you like him or USED to crush on him, he wants THAT back, because he LIKES getting his EGO stroked.
It is appropriate? No.
But, you CAN NOT control him or his actions - you CAN on the other hand control yourself. And the best thing you can do, is to ignore him. He will move on to someone else for the ego-stroke sooner or later.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2015): @Aunty BimBim. Yes he knew I liked him and he was a flirt before and he would tell me about the times he did things alone, placing emphasis on thefact he was alone while he had a girlfriend. He did many things but I won't get into it, we'll be here all day . What do I look like dealing with a man who tries to flirt with a woman who once had a crush on him and he knew it. Yeah he should put a bucket over his head. You don't find a married man attempting to flirt with other women inappropriate?
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (2 January 2015):
 What did you expect once he got married, that he would put a bucket on his head to avoid any interaction?
Did he know you were crushing on him, did he ever give you any reason to believe there was more there than interaction between two work colleagues?
I also think he sounds a bit immature, he is trying to get your attention, you say he has tried speaking to you ..... I hope you speak back, he could be trying to work out why you are all dry and professional and wanting to get the workplace back to the friendly, happy place it used to be.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 January 2015):
He misses the attention he used to get from you, BEFORE you know about the GF/now wife.
Just because a person get married doesn't mean they get instant blinders on, or no longer wants social interactions.
He seems a little immature honestly, like a little kid that will pull down his pants for attention.
Just keep being professional and if he keeps "bugging" you call him out on it. (not in front of others mind you).
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