A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Advice needed please. So Saturday night I invited my Cousin over for a chat and a catch up as I'm staying in the area while another family member is in hospital. My cousin and I are not close and although we've met a few times and went to the same primary school, haven't really spent any significant time together. anyway we get on great, very similar personalities and had laugh. He popped a film on and we sat on the sofa, we had a bit of a drink but not enough to be drunk. All of a sudden he pulls my legs up and puts them over his, he laid down and cuddled upto me, at this point I was a bit unsure what to do but it felt ok so I didn't say anything. He then started stroking my side and before I knew it we we're passionately kissing, his hands wondering all over me, we had mind blowing sex, so passionate and intense, I've never felt so good, we continued having sex all night, fell asleep naked in each other's arms and had sex once more at 5.30am. He then went back to sleep. I was physically exhausted by the end and I can honestly say it was the best night of my life, I never knew sex could feel that good. when I woke him up later that day, I said to him well, I wasn't expecting that last night in a cute way, he giggled and said me either but who started it me or you? I said him and then he smiled and said I'm sorry. shortly after he spoke about going over his sometime and a general chat about his mum (my aunt) he said if I wanted company anytime to message him and he'll come over. After he left and what we did had time to sink in I was absolutely mortified! I couldn't make up my mind whether it was just the fact he's my cousin or because the sex was Filthy or both Lol. Probably both. Anyway I sent him a message that night saying are you awake yet? As he said he was going home to sleep and recover. He has totally blanked me... This has thrown me off and hurt me a bit to be honest,I know he has a bit of a reputation with the ladies which is hardly surprising giving his talents but first and foremost he's my cousin we did something we probably shouldn't have and I'd like to talk about it with him, mainly because I can't get my head around how good he made me feel, I definitely would do it again though. But why is he blanking me? I don't get it.
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female
reader, like I see it  +, writes (16 June 2015):
 It sounds like maybe hormones got the best of him and while you are accepting and open to the possibility of being a "cousin couple," he realized the next morning that this situation might not be for him, even if he wanted it at the time.
I agree that blanking you about it is not the most courteous way to proceed. But I'm guessing that if he regrets or feels wrong about the encounter then he honestly has no idea how to proceed and, in the absence of knowing what to do/say, is choosing instead to do/say nothing.
I wish you all the best moving on and forward from this, because from the sound of things that is what you need to do.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (16 June 2015):
 I wouldn't be comfortable having with sex with any of my first cousins, too close to doing it with a brother in my book. Maybe he feels the same way and regrets his actions, only he knows. But when a guy, any guy cousin or not, totally "blanks" you after he's gotten into your pants it usually means he has achieved his goal and has moved onto newer and greener pastures
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJls022 my side of the family already has a cousin couple who have been together for a long time now and have children of their own so I'm not concerned in the slightest on that front.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (16 June 2015):
 Blanking you is a discourteous way to react and he should not be doing that to you. Perhaps it is his usual modus operandi? He cannot avoid you completely so you will get an opportunity to find out the reason he has blanked you.
Yet he (sort of) left open a possibility of a repeat performance but in the light of his blanking you I think that invitation might have the sincerity of "let's do lunch"
I think some form of a short talk might help put your mind at rest that you did nothing wrong. Yes it was unexpected but it sounds like it was very mutually satisfying. Until later when you had second thoughts and later again when he blanked you.
I am happy that you experienced "never had it so good sex," and before you worry about it being illegal it is important to recognise that in the UK it is not illegal to have a relationship with your cousin and nor is it illegal to marry first cousin in the UK.
You already had the familiarity and you get on well and have similar personalities.
Despite him being an opportunist and chancing his luck you both ended up getting into it in an enthusiastic manner and even enjoyed a little more in the morning.
Men who are VGIB are gems. And usually keepers, but as his cousin then it may be that being VGIB will not be enough, as he is your cousin, and that seems to bother you. Plus you mentioned that the two of you are not that close.
Thus I don't see this becoming a long term relationship and I don't think either of you were nor are angling for that.
Yet after you had some time to think and let it "sink in" then you were "absolutely mortified!" A cousin to cousin relationship was not what you had in mind.
Seeing as you both have very similar personalities then it is likely that he too is now thinking, "what have I done?"
THAT might explain his Blanking response.
I don't think either of you should be too harsh on each other.
He may especially enjoy making love and over time he has become very good at doing so. Despite being VGIB it sounds like he may prefer to be a rolling stone and gather no moss, but I don't think he meant any harm.
He might be a little worried if he used no protection, not knowing if you are already taking protection from pregnancy or not. He may worry that his Aunt or Uncle may be upset at him, or even his own mother or father, if word gets out.
At the moment it is still a secret between the two of you.
Find a way to debrief with him so that the two of you can resolve what ever issues have arisen.
He does not need to blank you. After all you are his cousin.
He can be assured that it was an amazing night of passion. But due to your concern about the implications if the rest of the family discovered this then it may be that you ask him to be discreet and not discuss your liaison with others.
Or you and he may like to continue some contact. How much contact would have to be discussed with him and you and be mutually agreeable.
At least you do know that when he finally settles down that his partner is going to be blessed with some awesome love making.
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A
female
reader, jls022 +, writes (16 June 2015):
Because he realises how messy this could get. How do you think your parents would feel if they knew what had happened? Regardless of how the sex was, you should really do the same as him and forget it ever happened before you damage your family for good.
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