A
female
age
36-40,
*Desire*
writes:ok, here is my problem and i need help.ive been with my bloke for almost a year and i was best friends with one of his work friends. I know that this friend saw me as more than that and no matter how hard i told him we were only ever going to be mates we still remained close.However, a few months ago he was walking me home from a club, i was upset, drunk and had an argument with my bf. He came on to me, i pushed him away and we havent spoken since. my bf knows all this.however now i think that im developing feelings for this friend, i miss his company but he avoids me in the street and started rumours about me, what should i do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2007): Firstly you need to be honest and upfront with your boyfriend about your feelings. You owe him that much. A relationship is nothing without truth and honesty. Believe me when I say that no matter how hard you try to keep your feelings from him they will come out and it will make things worse. I know what I am talking about because I am going through these issues with my husband, which is why I have asked him for a seperation. Anyway, there is a chance that you may lose your boyfriend but at least he knows the truth. As for this other guy I don't think he is worth it. If he couldn't accept that you weren't intersted at the time and he reacted by spreading rumours why would you want to be with him. Imagine if you got with him and you have a huge fight, the first thing he is going to do is spread rumours about you. You don't need that. Us women think we need a man around. After 20 years of being with my husband it's tough being single, it's tough on the kids but at the end of the day I have to learn to stand on my own and become independent and so should you as you don't seem to really love your boyfriend otherwise you would not have feelings for another man.I know this is harsh but believe me this is the reality of it all. Good luck with what ever decision you make and remember be open and honest with your boyfriend. You never know after he gets over being hurt this might make you two stronger.
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