A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey i need advice. me and my partner have always had money worries, when i fell pregnant i was in college, so had to quit after the first year (two year course) by time i had finished my first year i was 5months pregnant so couldnt work, but i saved my Education Maintenance Allowance to pay for my baby's stuffthen we rented a house so we could live on our own. my partner recently had his hours at work cut down, from 48hours a week to 24hours a week, we ended up on benefits. i have a 9month old son now so i stay at home to look after him. we privately rent our house and the landlord kept asking for rent when befefits were being sorted out. my partners and his sister's dad died a while ago and their dad left all his money to his sister (£19,000 which is i think $30,168.29 according to the internet) she was under 18years old so couldnt access it, she turned 18years old and gave my partner £1,000 i think which is $1587.60 to pay for 3months worth of rent. i didnt know about this until she gave it him because he didnt tell me.we are getting married in 3weeks, luckily we paid for most of it before he had his hours cut down and my mum is paying for the reception and buffet. the only thing to pay for now is the rings and cake. he told me before we moved in he had saved the money for our wedding so didnt worry.i asked him the other day why we had no money, he said the benifits didnt backpay him, so had to use money we saved for wedding on bills so are really struggling to pay for stuff at the moment. i dont know if this is true or not but all i know is we have no money, last week we had no food in the house, the food we did have in i gave to my son, ill rather starve then him! (i have told him, i dont care if we have no rings or cake, i just want to marry him)his sister now keeps asking for her money back, she spent the whole £19,000 in 2weeks and aparently now has no money, yet can go out getting drunk, driving lessons, etc. i bet she isnt struggling paying for food.she keeps texting my partner asking him. she said if he doesnt shes going to "sell the debt" which i dont think she can do because there is no legal contract or anything saying we owe her money. she gave us it in cash. she keeps texting me asking me to get him to text her. i ended up flipping and having ago at her, telling her we have no money for food sometimes. she was like "hang on i didnt have to give you the money" so i said to her, yeah you didnt i wish you didnt now, but i didnt even know about it. i asked her why she couldnt wait 4weeks until after our wedding, she ignored the question and just kept having ago at me, i said to her so you'd rather see your nephew starve so you get your money and after after shes got her money to leave us alone.i know she didnt have to give us the money and im greatful even though i didnt know about it. but shes going to be my sister in-law, shes family, surely she can wait 4weeks, she obviously doesnt care about her nephew starving, all she wants is her money back. she had £19,000, she shouldnt of spent all that, should she. she only gave us the money 3/4months ago and expects it back like now, even if my son suffers. my partner is looking for full time work, we cant afford a nursery to put our son in so i can go to work, well until my partner goes full time i cant, i am willing to work weekends but cant find any jobs at the moment. i dont know where our money is going, my partner is in charge of that and doesnt involve me, when i ask him he just says "do you want to sort out the bills then?" all im concerned about is food on the table, a warm house and a happy life. does anyone have any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): I know it sounds awful but I would tell her to stick her debt where the sun don't shine. She cant "sell" the debt on, she can however take you to the small claims court. It costs to do that and as you said she's spent all of her money I doubt that she would be able to afford it. Are you claiming all the tax credits that you are entitled to? and housing and council tax benefit? Its worth having a check just to make sure.
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