A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey thanks for taking the time to read this. As much as I love my boyfriend, his friends are a bit of an issue for me. Our relationship use to be long distance at one point and his friends use to encourage him to cheat on me behind my back with girls at the bar and to dump me. I've always been faithful to him even when we were long distance.He has two female friends who have always hated me and they flirt with him and are always spam texting him throughout the night and spamming his Facebook account. I've seen messages they've sent to him talking really sexual and really flirty. My boyfriend usually doesn't reply to that though, but I don't know whats really going on with that. Another one of his female friends who he usually goes to whenever me and him have any problems (which me and him rarely have any problems) has always been telling him to dump me and that I'm not a good girlfriend. I just don't think some of his friends like me or have much respect for me and it makes me feel bad. I don't feel like I've ever done anything wrong to any of them. Other than his friends, me and him have always had a great relationship and get on great. But do you think this situation is going to get worse? Would it be a better idea to stay with my boyfriend or leave? I really don't want to leave him.Thanks again for your time.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2013): Perhaps his friends don't respect you because your boyfriend didn't respect you while you were apart.
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (16 May 2013):
 Sounds like these so called 'friends' of his are a bit more than friends. When a couple has a problem they should be sorting it out between each other, not running off to cry on someone else's shoulder.These friends are also not friends of your relationship, so either your bf cuts ties with them and concentrates on your relationship, or you move on with your life.Clearly it sounds like he is living a double life, one with you and one with these friends. And instead of putting up with the nasty comments, your bf should be defending you.You say you dont want to leave him, well then you must make the final decision to be treated badly and cheated on [yes this is what he is doing] or look for a partner that will treat you with respect and be in an exclusive and non abusive relationship.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2013): Yes this situation will probably get worse unless he dumps his friends. And it doesn't look like that's going to happen anytime soon.You don't have to leave him though, you could just ignore them.'Another one of his female friends who he usually goes to whenever me and him have any problems (which me and him rarely have any problems) 'The problem is not these women, it's your boyfriend. going to other women when you and him are having problems is a sign of a weak man who has no boundaries. An honorable man would keep his mouth shut and not go blabbing about the private details of his relationship to other people. If he has a problem with you, then he should fix it with you, or if he really needs to discuss it with other people it's more appropriate to talk with his male buddies or else a female family member like a sister or something. but then again, it's rude of him to be revealing private information about what goes on between you and him, to other people regardless of who they are.
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