A
female
age
41-50,
*nevelopes
writes:While visiting one of my boyfriend’s long time female friends, she decided to take a shower and began walking around in nothing but a towel. At the time, I did not say anything to her but I was very upset and later spoke to him and banned him from seeing her with out me. My boyfriend says I over reacted but he will respect this “new rule”. I think, me overacting would have been following my first instincts and scratching her eyes out. What do you think? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Enevelopes +, writes (9 July 2008):
Enevelopes is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNO news is good news. Nothing to update
A
male
reader, AnonymousBob  +, writes (21 May 2008):
She is a long female friend of his. Friends can feel comfortable doing that in front of each other. Your boyfriend is in a relationship with you, and not this girl, that should say something.
If anything, you shouldn't scratch her eyes out, but his haha! I'm joking, but really, he looks at you like that, not her - that's why he's in a relationship with you.
You can't control the way his friends act. And you should NEVER stop him seeing his friends. You should trust him. Nothing will ever come of her. Sure, she might walk around in a towel, but I'm sure he's seen you in less ;P
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A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (21 May 2008):
 Scratching her eyes out would have been overreacting, yes... but I think your ultimatum was overreacting too. Did he tell this long-time friend to start prancing around the house in a towel? Did he have any control over the situation? It seems like you were visiting her at her home. Did you consider that she may do that all the time with or without you guys around?
...or, perhaps, is this an ex-GF of his? I suppose the other issue to think about here is why would you have the urge to attack her? What are your emotional motivations for it? Maybe Jealousy? Maybe you felt your own femininity was threatened by this friend?
Seriously, I do think that you are overreacting some here. I think you need to ask yourself why you felt so strongly about it. Even if you feel justified for your "new rule" I think you need to explain why, if not to your boyfriend, at least to yourself.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (21 May 2008):
 maybe she thought she felt comfortable with you and ddnt think she needed to be 100% clothed, me and some of my friends do if were at my house and changing to go out that we are comfortable with our bodies and having a towel covers more than enough to not be revealing. its maybe out of your comfort zone and dont like it. you are within your rights not wanting him to see her without you but atleast youre not being completely unreasonable ie not letting him see her at all your going %50 %50. maybe you overreacted a bit but if you feel unhappy with the equation then u were right to act on it.. thats my opinion A xxx
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A
female
reader, softballplaya +, writes (21 May 2008):
 well its a yes and no situation
I think you thought rationally by asking to be present at any of their get togethers, you have to take in consideration that she is his long time friend and he prolly sees it as over reacting because he knows that nothing could possibly happen between them. I personally thing you didnt overreact im just trying to see where your bf is comming from. But yeah if another girl was walking around in juss a towel in fron of my bf I would be highly pissed. Your heart was in the right place by respecting him and his friend by not flipping out on her (or clawing her eyes, which ever your prefer lol) Dont let this chick stress you out, you handled the situation like anyone would
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