A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well there is this boy I have been dating for a few months and i like him a lot. Problem is he is very depressed and sensitive to everything so i have to watch what i say all the time. He is on anti-depressants but they don't seem to be working. I have tried talking to him about it but he refuses to even try therapy. I would not have started even talking to him if it weren't for me being in therapy. I like him a lot and I want to try and make this last. What makes the situation even more difficult is that a guy i have liked for a few years now has decided to kiss me and tell me that if anything happens between me and my boyfriend and him and his one year girlfriend that we could try dating. I'm not sure if my own opinion is biased by the fact i have a guy-in-waiting that i have wanted to be with for over a year now. But my boyfriend's depression is really putting a strain on me. It doesn't help that my boyfriend says that I "am his everything and doesn't know what he'd do without me." Also I am not sure how to tell him that I'm not going to be his everything and forever or that the white picket fence and kids dream is not for me. He is so sensitive and I don't want to hurt him. If you could give me insight as to what to do that would be very helpful since at this point I'm thinking of breaking it off even though i really like him.
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female
reader, heart-shaped-balloon  +, writes (5 October 2010):
 You need to up and leave him... As harsh as that sounds. My friend had the exact same problem. Her boyfriend even threatened suicide if she left.
Once she left, he was forced to stand on his own two feet. It made him a much stronger, happier, and more popular person. He still battled depression, but he was much better off. If you stay with him he will continue to not help himself and will drag you down with him.
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