A
female
age
30-35,
*oltongirl
writes:im really worried because while in bed with my boyfriend i will play about with him by giving him a handjob and i will give him a blowjob and he wont do anything for me i try to drop hints like saying what do i get and he says sex, i spoke to him the other day and he was like i know ive been selfish but no offence you do get really wet i felt so embarrassed, is they anyway to stop me getting really wet cause i like oral and then sex but he fingered me for a couple of mins last night but he stopped i dont want to feel like im forcing him i dont what him to do it if he doesnt like it
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blow-job, hand-job, really wet Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sweety91  +, writes (2 February 2011):
This might be like so so late To Comment but i have to tell you that once i read this. this is happeninmg to me too. i got some advice from the comments they left you. i didnt talk to my boyfriiend and he understood. so know he says he just has to get over it and that he will do it this time.
A
female
reader, pixie200 +, writes (4 June 2010):
it could be that he is nervous bout oral thats all. Or that he doesn like it or think he might not, got few male mates like that and they in 30's. Dont be paranoid. Yr a healthy young lass. It could also be that he selfish and just wants his own pleasures. Stop with the bj's and things might look up.x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2010): He sounds like a complete idiot, whatttt!??!?!
He is not ready for sex (or is posibly gay) if he's not enjoying you.
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (3 June 2010):
 The others put it diplomatically. I'd just say your guy is an idiot.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 June 2010):
 Wow, sorry honey, but you need to stop doing things to him if he can't "return" the favor. And... maybe give him a book on female reproductive organs...
YOU (as a female) are SUPPOSED to get wet. It's natural lube a females body produces when she is aroused and it's produced to make the the whole sex act easier and more pleasurable.... for both parties.
He is clueless. He needs to stick to his own right hand or a "sock puppet".....
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 June 2010):
To be honest, I'm not sure he's ready for sex at all. He doesn't seem to understand what he's doing, or how a woman works, or anything like that. Maybe he's just shy or something. I think you should just explain that this is how you are, and if he can't accept it then maybe he should just move on. But it sounds to me like he doesn't really know what he's doing.
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A
female
reader, EbonyBlossom +, writes (3 June 2010):
 Well firstly, I don't see how getting too wet is particularly a problem if he's fingering you, although I guess I can understand why he wouldn't want to go down on you if you did get as wet as he says you do. Maybe this is a cover up because he is too embarrassed to say that he's never done it before and is worried he won't please you. Ask him if this is true and assure him that it doesn't bother you in the slightest. If your boyfriend doesn't mind, or you can ask in secret, ask your exes/guys you've been with before if you get wetter than other girls (don't tell them why you are asking.) Alternatively talk to a nurse to see if you are normal or not. No pun intended, but to me, it sounds like your boyfriend is being a bit of a pussy. But until you sort it, count yourself lucky that you get sex as well because a lot of people on here don't even get that from their partner =]
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (3 June 2010):
 I've never heard of this excuse before. Is he allergic to pussy juice? Is he a neat freak? I don't know what his problem is. A lot of people look at pussy juice as sacred, hence the name amrita. When you are turned on, you are turned on. It's pretty involuntary. It defeats the purpose of the joyful act when you have to pretend you don't like it when in fact you do like it. Have baby wipes accessible always. Whatever issue he's having, he has to get over it. I will let him pass on doing oral since a lot of guys don't like doing it, but he seems to be looking at sex as a dirty thing, like he got a handful of bacteria when he touched you. That would totally dampen my mood and hurt my feelings. In reality the vagina flora is more sanitary than inside a mouth, so tell him there is nothing to worry about. If he's that worried about bacteria he can't even kiss you. Maybe he's young and inexperienced. Give him some time, or not. Like wine, it takes time to appreciate that bitter flavor.
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A
male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (3 June 2010):
Your boyfriend is so clueless! Being wet is actually a good thing. A very good thing! There are so many women that have problems being turned on enough, which means they aren't wet enough to have sex.
The idea that you want to be less wet is just ridiculous! I know you are young and don't know much about your bodies and sex, but seriously - when you think being turned on is a bad thing, there is something wrong somewhere. Sounds like you need to read up yourself on female sexuality and then give your boyfriend a crash course in it too!
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