A
female
age
30-35,
*ndieCindy
writes:My boyfriend of 14 months won't open up to me and it's getting me very upset. Last night I knew something was troubling him and he told me to leave it. I proceeded to question him and he says it's personal and he doesn't want me to know. This has really upset me because I tell my boyfriend everything and he won't open up to me. Why do you think this is? We've had complete arguments about this situation all day and he says I'm being selfish. Maybe I am but I know bottling up your feels isn't a good thing to do and I'm very worried :( please help! X Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2013): no where near enough time has passed for you to be getting upset about this, you should let it go, and if in a week or two he's still mulling around being sulky and not explaining, then you can sit down with him and explain how that attitude is hurting you because you feel you can't help him through whatever it is.if in that time he lightens up and seems to be moving on, you should also let it go. people don't always want to share EVERYTHING, which...is why you are asking us and not telling him you're asking us, it's sorta personal is all.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (14 March 2013):
 Generally:
Women like to vent... we talk about things just to get them off our chest
Men like to problem solve and will not discuss problems just to air their feelings. For many men, they see talking about something as a waste of time if they can't solve the problem.
If you can't accept that your bf is one of these men, and respect his desire not to talk about it, then there's not much hope for you two in the long run.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (14 March 2013):
 Of course your B/F has every right to keep some things to himself..... ESPECIALLY those details that apply to HIM and THE OTHER GIRLFRIEND that he is keeping....
Are your eyes open these days????
Good luck....
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (14 March 2013):
He has every right to keep certain things to himself; stop bugging him about it. You can either learn to accept the way he is or break up with him and find someone who you're more compatible with. BUT, trying to nag him into changing will not work AT ALL!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2013): Who says he's bottling up his "feels"? He could be talking to others about it instead.
OP you should respect his privacy for the moment. If you really needed to know he'd tell you. Stop prying and stop worrying, let him sort it out and he'll probably tell you what it was in the future but right now he wants you to respect his privacy so that's what you should do. You're only making this worse by creating an argument out of it.
You say you tell him everything, that include what your last shit was like? The smell, consistency or that your latest menstrual cycle was particularly heavy and stinky? Did you tell him the last time you wiped arse and the tissue slipped and you got a bit of shit on your finger?
No, so you don't tell him everything OP, you too like to have certain things private. So respect his privacy here.
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