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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm quite embarrassed about asking this, but i have no one else to ask... i'v been going out with my boyfriend for about 6 months now, and we started having sex, but he never manages to finish 'if you know what i mean' and he told me he'll only manage if i had to use dirty talk and basically be a bit of a savage with him... and this is all very new to me so I have no idea what to do. please give me some tips. Anything Reply to this Question
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male
reader, landomando  +, writes (23 April 2012):
LOL!!! do the laundry haha!!! i am a simple lover too. all that stuff is just fun at times but every time is hard to think of stuff... I got a good orde to tell him. shut up and kiss me lol
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (22 April 2012):
 If you run out of things/places to say, just repeat what you've already said. Check for the trigger words that will excite him the most when you're dirty talking by watch his facial expressions, body language, and what he says verbally.
And if you don't want to talk dirty all the time, have a conversation with him and let him know how you feel. Tell him that you want to please him without a doubt by dirty talking- but you don't want to do that all the time. Tell him there will be times that you just want to make love- and try to work together on your issues in the bedroom.
Best wishes!
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all soo much for your help! its great help! and i tried what you guys said and he was soo surprised and happy with me! i've got another similar problem now, thought i'd ask you guys since i'm clueless. So when things heat up and hes really getting into it he keeps asking me to tell him what to do, like in an order and whisper it and i'll say things like: i want u to kiss my neck/ lick there / even to spank me... but im running out of ideas on what to tell him to do. Truth is i'm a very simple lover, i like to experiment sometimes but majority of the time i just want to make love and i don't need to use dirty talk. So these things are very difficult for me to come up with. Are there any tips or tricks you can give me? like trigger words or sexy orders that will help. If only i can order him to do the laundry haha
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A
male
reader, landomando +, writes (5 October 2011):
Thats really weird not gona lie. he wont finish??? its not that hard to talk a little dirty but he seems like he may want something really dirty.. Guys like it if you tell them there peeppee is BIG!!! so say that alot and be like f me hard, your soo deep... Moan and stuff. But to be honest I would google a porno and just watch to see how the girls talk because they do that alot. And i bet thats what he wants. learn from the pros right.
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A
female
reader, HoneyComb +, writes (5 October 2011):
If you're like me just coming up with things to say can be a struggle. I suggest ordering books of erotica and short stories. With the internet it's easy to browse, but order only from sites that promise to be discreet or better yet order from Amazon or other reputable bookstores. The stories will give you material to use in the bedroom, either read them alone and act it out later or offer to read stories to him. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (4 October 2011):
It's o.k. don't feel embarrassed. :^) Dirty talking (amongst many other things) can add spark and/or excitement in the bedroom. And the fact of the matter is most guys have certain triggers from what a woman does or says to get them off. But I think you (and everyone) should always look to maximize the performance in the bedroom anyway. Always try to have a great sexperience. :^) So here's what you can do:1. Imagine you're a different person. If you're generally shy and/or consider yourself very conservative in the bedroom, this may work well for you. Just imagine you're a different woman. Maybe sexy, dominant (or submissive depending on how you do it), highly sexual woman. A porn star even. Or an actress playing a sex role- (role playing would actually work well for this situation and may make things a bit more easier to do and fun) and say whatever comes to mind. Read his body language and watch his expressions to see what words trigger a good reaction. 2. If the above tip seems a bit too much to handle right now...then find out what exactly he would like to hear. Many guys have no problem expressing what (words) excites them. Try practicing it alone at first. Say out loud what he would like to hear you say..and have fun with it. Say it in a low, sexy tone, or even in a different accent (as long as it sounds sexy :^) ). This may seem a bit silly at first, but you should be able to get the hang of it after a while. I'm sure he would definitely appreciate the effort.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2011): I had the same problem as you until recently. For about 8 months I was very inhibited with my guy, even though he had no inhibitions at all. He used to whisper dirty things into my ear all the time and I found it such a turn-on but when he asked me to do it back I didn't know how. One day, I decided to just go for it, and I'm so glad I did. He wasn't expecting it at all so it made it all the better. I asked him if he was turned on, and then told him what I like doing to/with him, describing it in quite a lot of detail. I then told him what I like him to do to me and how it makes me feel. Then asked him again whether he was turned on, even though the answer was very obvious. Now, I don't do it every time. Sometimes I like to whisper right into his ear how much I think about him when I'm alone, or when I'm at work, doing mundane things. How I think about his hands and mouth all over me, how I get so turned on that it's almost painful. I tell him about my fantasies about him while I'm doing said mundane things. I exaggerate if I need to, but usually don't have to. Sometimes I say really dirty things and use swearwords, but generally I don't need to. I find it's possible to be graphic in a subtle way. Last time I told him that I dreamed about waking him up in the morning using just my mouth and making him come when he was barely awake. He was literally gasping.Just go with it. Have fun. He'll love it.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (4 October 2011):
 Tell him where to cum lol and point. That is incredibly hot.
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