A
female
age
26-29,
*TheAlmightyDuckx
writes:Well..Basically i broke up with my current boyfriend sometime last week. It was hard because I had faith that he was different, but I guess not. I've had two serious relationships since being a teen and they both have gone to shit. So I guess I just want to know have I done the right thing? Basically it was the day before his birthday, we had been together for 3 months, he has this little joke where he hacks my facebook, so for a laugh, I though I would do it to him. When I got on his facebook however I was very suprised to see he was halfway through a convorsation with another girl, it was extremely flirtasious and "dirty" to say the very least. I ovbiously flipped, and told him to get out. After a few days just thinking things over, I decided I could put this mistake behind me, as I guess i'm just abit of a mug. However that weekend I went down town to see some friends, and they told me that another girl had told them that she met up with my boyfriend on friday for sex. I was furious, he said he was innocent, and tbh her story kept on changing, she even admitted she made up the part about meeting up for sex. It all seemed very convient as he couldn't meet me on that friday as he said he was doing "revision" for college. Eventually we came to the conclusion it wasn't true. However she then began to tell me, what clothes he was wearing, and even started to tell me what time he left to come and see me. It seemed to slot into place perfectly, and when I confronted him, he made up some un-realistic excuses, and tryed his very hardest to convince me he didn't go to her house or meet her. After two days of interrogation, he came clean, said he did go to her house, and lyed to me the entire time, she came clean to and told me he spent most the night asking her for sex. I dumped him straight away, without any sort of doubt in my mind. I do miss him slightly, as his personality was very different, I have decided that relationships aren't going to be my thing for a while, as for my own mental health I can't even put up with taking another risk and getting hurt again. I just want to know, did I do the right thing? Is not getting into another relationship (even though I aparently have a few admirers, not being big headed) the right choice? and will I be okay without him? And where should I go from here? Thanks for reading.
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female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (13 March 2013):
xTheAlmightyDuckx is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thankyou for your answers, they have really given me some faith. I never found out if he actually cheated on me, but there was a situation where we had only been a month in and he was accused of kissing a girl at a party. We came to the conclusion it wasn't true simply because everyone was to drunk to remember anything, but I found out from a friend who was at the party a few days ago, that he was aparently "all over her", so I guess it was true. I didn't see any point in carrying things on with him, if I had to interriogate my own boyfriend for the truth, and spend each day living with un-certainty of whether it was true or not. I know I deserve better than this, as before him my first boyfriend of 9 months was controlling and mentally, and physically abusive, so I couldn't be dealing with another one like him. Its hard because he had a certain charm about him, and we were very compatible together, but I guess he was just another one who thought with his penis instead of his brain. I've even taking a chalymedia test and am waiting on results, just in case. I think I am just going to enjoy my teenage years for a while, and leave relationships for a while and just have fun. Also I do speak to my mum about this kind of thing alot, and she says the same, teenage boys are well...teenage boys. So yeah I guess you just confirmed to me that my mum's point of view is a lot more valuable than I thought. Thankyou xx
A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (13 March 2013):
 Let me start off by saying that you're awesome for the decision you've made! Im your age so i relate completely. To answer your questions: you will do perfectly fine without him. You don't need a boyfriend. If you decide not to date anymore/ for a while then that's your choice, a good one at that. Take some time to have fun with friends and focus on school for a while. Maybe you'll find someone worth dating sometime in the future. All im saying is, you're young and full of life. Don't let some dumb guy get you down or question some things in life. Live while you're young is what i say. I hope i've helped
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2013): You're just a teenage girl and you'll be breaking up quite a few times before you find the right boyfriend. You should have a lot of fun and not be too serious. You have school to worry about, and eventually ready for university.He's a teenage boy. They will break your heart. You'll break someone's heart too, sometimes not meaning to. Don't try to be too serious; because even as adults, things between people get really complicated. Enjoy being young and free. Watch out for boys who think they're "players." They're jerks and just want to see how many girls will fall for them. It's stupid, but girls usually mature faster than boys.You really should be talking to your parents. Your mom should be a source of advice. That's what she's there for.She will explain things out of love, she knows you better and can be available anytime you need her advice. I know kids think their parents are lame, and too much in their business. She is going to be the shoulder to cry on for many years to come. She was your age once, and believe me, guys haven't changed that much.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (12 March 2013):
 HI
Yes I think you did do the right thing. Boys at this young age rarely want the serious relationship, they are still working out who they are, there hormones are all over the place. Very few boys will be mature enough to have a relationship. Take time to work out who you are and what is important to you right now, is it boys? or is it a great life were one day when its right you will meet the man of your dreams? I would much prefer the latter.....you have a whole life ahead of you and plenty of time for relationships, spend time doing what you enjoy, go out with the girls, travel, if I could turn back the clock I would be somewhere in africa or egypt , not settling down to a life of working, washing,cooking,cleaning,explaining what when why or who, have a serious relationship when you can honestly sit down and say, I have done most or all I wanted to do, now its time for a committed long term relatioship.
Mandy x
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