A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I am 21, and my bf is 25. We have been together for about 10 months now. When we first met, I remember him telling me that he usually goes for "older women" and has never dated someone younger. I felt a bit insecure and on edge because of that. Having said that, I am the longest relationship hes ever had.Anyway to get to the point of the story, he is friends with this older women, who is married and has kids, but honestly, she acts like a insecure 15 year old teenager girl. When my bf leaves to go away for work she says things like "oh my god, please dont leave me babe, how will i deal without you, i need you, dont leave me". She calls him all sorts of nicknames like spunky, babe, hottie etc...Shes always fishing for compliments saying things like "ohhh why are you going out with a younger girl, dont you like older women like me, arent i good enough? remember im more experienced ;) " I get reeally upset when they spend time together or talk because of this. I feel like she doesnt respect our relationship. When I tell my bf this, he just says my feelings are invalid because shes married and has kids...apparantly that ensures she would never do no wrong. Which is complete bullshit. Everyone knows that over 50% of marriages these days end in divorce...marriage doesnt stop a person from cheating.And she doesnt seem to take her vows seriously to me. She tells my bf shes "lonely"...why doesnt she tell her husband that? Why go telling MY BF????????This makes me so mad. What makes me mader is that my bf dont tell her to stop. Probably because he secretly likes the ego boost it gives him. This hurts me even more, its like he cares more about geting his ego boost fix, than my feelings. Am i overeacting or what? I constantly feel so insecure when shes in contact with my bf, especially since shes older and she makes comments about how I am so young and in experienced, apparantly that makes me a bad gf? Also knowing that my bf has alwyas had a thing for older women worries me.What do I do?
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male
reader, jas8  +, writes (3 January 2010):
glad its workin out, so its ure first time, you gonna have to catch up quick, as he is way ahead of you, just have an opened mind and experiment as much as you can with him, he'lll love it... you can be in love but at the end of the day sex plays a huge part in a relationship.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUpdate: Today my bf finally stood up to that women and told her to stop making all those types of comments etc, he laid down the boundaries. I dont know why he suddenly did this, Ive been trying to get him to do it for ages.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (3 January 2010):
Well it does, depending what he's been up to with her
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionjas8 & caring guy:
Ok I see where you are both coming from. But the thing is, before me, all the older women my bf had been with, they were just purely sexual relationships and only ever lasted a couple of months max. Where as me and my bf have lasted 10 months and I feel we have more then just a sexual relationship because we only started having sex a couple of weeks ago! So we pretty much waited 10 months. I wanted to wait because thats what i believe in and he respected that. And although we are having some difficulties having sex now because its my first time, hes been really patient and understanding. Doesnt that count for something?...
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A
male
reader, jas8 +, writes (2 January 2010):
honestly, i love older women, they know wat they want witout any complications, not to say that u dont know wat u want... Now with my previous encounters with older women, is one thing on both minds and that is sex, complete insane all night sex. Ure bf is at the age where he needs it all the time, and older women want younger guys for their undivided attention and stamina, and younger guys find older women very attractive. I know im not really helping out here, but i guess honesty is the best. If this carries on dont waste ur time, move on...
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (2 January 2010):
No, I don't think you are over-reacting at all. I have a thing for older women, so I never go for younger girls who I'm not interested in just for this reason. Let him have his married woman. Find a guy who really does love you instead.
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