A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is a relly nice guy and a good frend. He's 26 and I'm 23 and we been seeing each othr for 2y. He has lots of close frends who he sees alot, guys and girls. He's quiet a popular guy where as Im way more reservd with only a few close frends. I like most his frends and get on alright with them. The problem is that he sumtimes cancels plans with me cos his frends want to do sumthing, or he drags me along to places I dont want to go or do things I dont want to do cos his frends want too. He seems to think he'd be letting his frends down if he sumtimes refuse cos of me or our plans. Im starting to feel annoyed and unimportant cos of this. What can I do?he's great every othr way. How can I fix this? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Petina57  +, writes (27 January 2016):
 He sounds like he likes to be active and interested in doing lots of things. His friends obviously are all into the same things of mutual interest. That's okay now you've come along. Join in the activities that you'll enjoy, put up with some things just to show willing and now and again if you really don't want to go anywhere with them just say so. Just say ,it's not really my thing so I'll give it a miss this time. Then at least your bf will get a better picture of what your likes and dislikes are, we don't have to all be the same. It's give and take in a relationship. Hope this helps
A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (3 January 2016):
 I think you need to build your own life that doesn't depend on him. Have your own interests and go out from time to time with your own mates. Just because you are a couple doesn't mean you have to be together all the time.
There has to be give and take. Sometimes he needs to go along with you to your things. Sometimes he needs to rearrange his plans. Talk it through and decide what's fair. Come up with a deal in which you don't feel second best.
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