A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am 49 and my boyfriend of 7 years is 38. We have sex 4-5 times a week. Lately, he is only able to orgasm through oral sex. Although I don't mind pleasuring him that way, I wonder why he is having trouble having orgasms through "regular" sex now. He doesn't have any problems with erections and stays that way for a long time. I know I should be grateful for a man with such stamina, but I often wonder why he can't orgasm inside me as much any more. Just been this way the last 6 months. It also makes me start wondering if he is bored. I am always the one to try to come up with new suggestions, but he always passes. What is going on?
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erection, oral sex, orgasm Reply to this Question
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (8 October 2008):
 Over the many years (I'm 60), my experience has been much the same. While I much enjoy vaginal intercourse and can go on and on, both my wife of two decades and a number of girlfriends since have been more likely to get me off orally. The sensations are simply more effective. As another responder said, "I seem to be more desensitized to (intercourse)." Of course, I'm not usually with women in their 20s or 30s anymore (more like 50s or early 60s), and quite frankly, they are not nearly as "tight." The result is that, only after I have pleasured my woman thoroughly (orally and however they like), it usually takes at least some amount of fellatio to bring about my finish.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2008): What you describe isn't unusual. I sometimes go through periods where it is difficult to ejaculate through intercourse. As I've gotten older, I seem to be a little more desensitized to it. I think it's normal. He reaches orgasm through oral because it is a different sensation on his penis. I can go for a half hour inside my wife's vagina but will be done in 2 minutes if she pleasures me between her breasts. Same concept. Just make sure you mix it up for him a little. Also, if you take a break for 2 or 3 days, he should be aroused enough to function inside you again. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Jack_McVeigh  +, writes (7 October 2008):
 ok darling.. first of all he is NOT bored of you, otherwise he would not be with you and also he would not cum at all! me and my boyfriend (yes i am gay) had this problem. He couldnt cum in intercourse either, only in oral sex. What we did was he didnt ejaculate at all for about 3 to 4 days, and then when we had sex the next time, he came inside me with no problem. Try that out- it worked for us! Oh and honey- he is not bored of you. Don't even think that! Good luck xxx Jack P McVeigh
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