A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Recently my boyfriend put me on ignore I have no real idea why, he then about a week later reached out via instant message and tried to talk to me by sharing a concern about his father's health and wanting to continue supporting my business financially by providing ink for my printer, also not wanting me to step completely out of his life, he wants to step away and just be friends, this man just a few days before stated he has loved me like no other and it has always been about us ,he does not look at the relationship as being just about him. I have a long distance relationship with this person and can only see him once every two months if were lucky, he is a very faithful man, I have my ex husband paying my rent right now because of a job loss, so having to be nice and around my ex here and there has confused me, not in the since of wanting him back that area is done no concern, and the fact I have this long distance relationship that I feel is a struggle just in that, I would like to face to face talk to my boyfriend but he ignores me, I could use some advise I do not intend on trying to contact for at least a month then I will take a drive for a face to face, my last words were I can respect you want to step away from the relationship, but I feel a face to face is necessary and respectful not internet and ignore Any feed back would be helpful......
View related questions:
long distance, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2012): maybe he's pulling back because your ex is very much part of your life and even financially supporting you. This sends your bf mixed messages. Normally, women don't get financially supported by a man outside of court-mandated alimony payments unless he is her intimate partner. if your ex is financially supporting you, you're sending your bf seriously mixed messages that he's not a real ex after all, which could be really confusing and which is why he's having second thoughts about the relationship.I also feel that it's inappropriate for you to be having your ex husband paying your rent, just as it would be inappropriate for you to have one of your regular friends be paying your rent, job loss or not. At the very least if you're struggling financially, you borrow the money from them but you pay it back. you're blurring the lines between relationship boundaries, this is sure to cause problems either with your ex as well. You say you have to be nice to your ex since he's paying your rent? You're basically using him. That's not fair to him either.
A
female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (25 February 2012):
 Hi, I agree with your concern with this and I hope what I am about to say helps you some. Men are strange creatures, when they are under stress, instead of communicating...they tend to withdraw and just say nothing. My boyfriend does the same thing...it drives me crazy. But unfortunately, it is how about 80% of them are engineered. A long distance relationship can be very hard on both parties..and you mentioned that he is very faithful. The only thing that I can see from what you said is that maybe he feels awkward or is now starting to feel awkward with regards to your ex being in the picture supporting you financially. He did mention that he wanted to support your business right? Perhaps he doesn't know how to vocalize his worry ...cause well...he's just a guy.I agree with you, give it some time before you talk to him again. If you feel that you need the closure with this and it is weighing heavy on your heart, follow your intuition and go visit and have your face to face. I seriously believe that women have a 6th sense...go with it and get your answers. Don't go all upset and hostile like...try to be calm..I know your heart is hurting and you are confused as to why you were on ignore...but take a deep breath and then go have your chat.Ana
...............................
|
