A
female
age
26-29,
*uffygirl88
writes:My boyfriend does stupid things and i think he is showing off for me. But the things that he does are pretty stupid like he fights a lot. He talks about naked women and boobs and that stuff. Do you think he wants someone else?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2010): I highly doubt he wants someone else, he's just being a teenage boy. His hormones and everything are flowing and girls and boobs are just something that is on his mind and will be for a while. He's normal and so is his desire to act like a man and fight and talk about naked women. The issue is do you want to put up with it and what are you wanting out of this relationship. First thing you need to do is sit down and talk to him and explain to him how the way he fights and talks about naked women bothers you and you'd appreciate it if he didn't do those things when he's around you. If he respects you he'll try to calm it down. But ultimately you have to decide if this is something you want to be around or not and go from there.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2010): I hope he is around your age, because that would explain his behaviour. Assuming (hoping) that is the case...
Many adolescent boy's hormones rage at your age and their brains are consumed with their sex drive that is in over drive. Their adult male hormones have just started and they have gone from a frail little girl's body to a man's body complete with body hair, muscles, and new found strength like they have never experienced before in their lives. Suddenly they have muscles to lift heavy objects, they can run faster and jump higher, and that gives young boys a mental rush of power like never before. Those elevated hormone levels cause agressive behaviour and often create today's daredevils and X-treme sports guys who take risks with their lives thinking they are invincible. It is all linked to the chmeical levels in their bodies (to put it in simple terms).
Along with the muscular changes, comes a strong sex drive, stronger than any woman's strongest sex drive. They often talk openly about girl's body parts, etc.. as a means of releasing pent up sexual frustration. His sex drive is way too fired up right now, so even after he orgasms and releases himself, his sex drive will kick back in within 15 minutes and he will be back to that dirty talk again. His hormones are affecting his brain and he cannot help it right now.
After a few years his hormone rush will even off and will stop affecting his brain so much, plus he will have better control of his emotions. Girls/women call this maturing, when actually it is simply his hormone levels stabilizing and his brain coming to learn how to control his adult state.
Women go through similar hormonal changes, with spikes and valleys of hormone levels each month. Your emotional state varies considerably each month, as I am sure you have noticed. Be objective, I am sure you have noticed that you fell really horny certain times of the month and really angry and hostile at other times. This is due to changing chemical levels in your body. Women expect men to afford them understanding of their monthly hormonal cycles (PMS) and the changing hormone levels that affect a woman's thought processes, so you should afford your boyfriend the same courtesy. Using "hijacked dignity's" overly simplistic diagnosis, your boyfriend is immature. However, that immaturity is driven by chemical levels in his body right now that he cannot control. For most men that lasts into their 20's. However, women deal with chemical imbalances until menopause. Ergo, using the simplistic diagnosis above, women only really "mature" when you pass menopause and your hormone levels stabilize and your monthly mood swings stop.
Now, with that said... not all people are the same. Some women do not experience the violent hormonal swings, just like some men. As such those people seem more stable and "normal" than people on the extreme ends of the spectrum.
You can either accept your boyfriend's behaviour right now, because you like being with him for other reasons, or find a guy who is not undergoing the extreme hormonal changes.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2010): I think he is very young, and immature. He thinks that men talk like that and he is trying to act grown up. What he doesnt realize is that (most) men aren't like that, and that showing off like that only works on other very immature boys.
If you tell him all that though, he wont take you seriously. Immature boys dont readily accept that girls know anything. Seems like perhaps if someone he looks up to, maybe dad or uncle, could steer him in the right direction as far as behavior goes.
I would not guess that he wants to date another girl. He is just overrun with hormones and wants to be cool. If it bothers you make it clear. He will either get the message or get dumped. Your choice.
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A
female
reader, veronika  +, writes (2 April 2010):
 He's a teenager. Teenagers are notorious for doing silly things and talking about sex, boobs, naked people and the like. A lot of teenagers are also immature. This is what he sounds like - a typical teenager.
I don't think fighting is necessarily right, but if he wants to be that way it's probably going to take a while for him to change, it's not going to happen over night. You have the choice as to whether you want to be around someone like this.
When I was a teenager (which wasn't *that* long ago...) I chose to not hang around a certain crowd of people because their behaviour didn't interest me. You could always do the same and stick with people you're more comfortable around.
In answer to your actual question, he could want someone else, who knows - we don't really know that much about your situation. Teenagers (hell, most people) don't just think about one person romantically or sexually.
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A
female
reader, Sweety Pie  +, writes (2 April 2010):
 I think he's just a teenage boy...
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (2 April 2010):
 Is he around the same age you are?
He is just really immature at the moment. I mean, us girls all know the rule, right? Boys are about three years behind on age than we are, especially during the teen years. ;)
But I think he is just acting normal for a guy his age. Guys in their early teens fight a lot, and they like girls. A lot. He may be too young to be in a serious relationship right now, and I think you might be too. I mean there is the entire world to explore! I think he is just a little immature, and when you are in relationships at the age you two are in right now, I think it's to be expected. Relationships don't really become a priority until later down the road, especially for some guys. Best of luck to you.
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