A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend loves to travel and has travelled extensively before we met.He is going on a 2 week trip to Spain next week. It's a place he has always wanted to visit. I cannot go due to it being my busy time at work. I told him to hold off and we can go together but he really wants to go. And instead has suggested we take a two week trip together in April. We've already booked the time off.The problem is that he is going on this trip by himself. And I resent him for it. A lot.I told him I would miss him and that his decision to take this trip alone won't be easy for me. I have since distanced myself from him because of it and he has done the same thing back. Distanced himself from me.We haven't distanced to the point of not talking but there is a coolness between us now. And I really don't like it. I just want to be happy! I am not sure if he feels guilty I don't want him to go or what the reason is that he is cool. I am not sure how to handle this or accept it and feel okay about it.The resentment is so deep right now. I think his going on this trip shows how little he cares about me and how little he is truly invested in our 2 year relationship. Can anyone help?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 January 2016):
 I get 26 days a year of vacation. My husband gets 14.
If I only took off when he could it would be a waste of my leave.
YOU are the one making the issues and the problems.
Having resentment is like swallowing poison and expecting the other person to get sick or die.
Love him freely and without reservations.
Use this time to determine if you can make it work with a man who is a bit more independent than you like.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 January 2016):
 Sometimes people just need to get away for a break on there own every so often to think through their lives. It might not be anything personal to do with you. He has even suggested he will take you there in April. I think you need to sit down and tell him how it has made you feel and then maybe he can explain to you why he is going on holiday.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (4 January 2016):
 This sentence: "... I think his going on this trip shows how little he cares about me and how little he is truly invested in our 2 year relationship." Why not ask HIM if this is, in fact, correct?
Sometimes, we project on to others how we ourselves would feel under the circumstances... but it's simply not so. (Politicians routinely tell us what their opponents "think"....).....
Get to the heart of the matter. If he confides that he actually DOESN'T much care about you.... then you know where you stand...
Good luck...
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