A
female
age
30-35,
*hat Girl 9.9
writes:I would appreciate any help you could give me. Here goes: My boyfriend has been searching for his birth mother for years. (She gave him up for adoption and he never met her) A few months ago, with help, he tracked her down. So anyway he met her a few days ago for lunch. I thought it would be a good idea for them to meet without me there, so I didn't go with him. We planned that he would pick me up from my house later to spend the night together. He came to my house earlier than expected on the verge of tears. He drove to his house without saying a word. When we got inside I asked him how it went and he burst into tears and hugged me really tight. Now he always is holding me or hugging me. Every night he cries Please give me some advice. How can I help him out? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2013): Your boyfriend is undoubtedly needing quite a bit of comfort. Until he calms down, I suggest you don't pester him for an answer (even if you're desperately curious).
I say this, because he may be needing to process his emotions and thoughts after experiencing something so uniquely personal.
All you can do, is be there when he needs you to be. Tread carefully, because he might be feeling oversensitive and burned out eventually.
Time will give you the answers you want to know, and the opportunity for him to reflect.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2013): I was adopted as a baby and i found my birth mum at the age of 15. It wasnt what i expected when i met her. She was married and had more cbildren and didnt have anytime for me. She is a selfish woman in many ways. Shes divorced now and living alone and i dont bother with her. Perhaphs your boyfriend also now he has met her has seen something he didnt expect i dont know. All i can say is stand by him and maybe he will eventually open up. His mother may have a new life and has shut him out i really dont know.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2013): Just let him RELEASE his hurt naturally,this is the way he expresses it. He may not even have any words to say at this moment in time so i would not press him. You sound like a very supportive girlfriend and understanding.
No doubt he will have a lot of up and down mixed emotions that will take time to balance.
...............................
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (13 June 2013):
 Just be a shoulder for him to cry on and try to get him to talk about it. Other than that, don't do a thing. Just be nice as usual.
...............................
|
