A
female
age
30-35,
*ubbloo24
writes:HelloMy boyfriend, (only just started daring him) - He's a bit wreckless and... well I guess you could call him a "bad boy". He told me that he uses this "bad boy image" as a kind of protective shield because he feels that everyone around him that he loves, leaves him, but that when he's with me he feels that this image is completely transparent and that he can be himself.We get on so well together, we make eachother laugh and when we're alone things are perfect, we had such a great weekend together but tonight I got very annoyed with him.After arranging to meet up with him, I was talking to my friend when his friend's car came zooming up the drive way, my boyfriend was hanging out of the window...He then got out and came stumbling over to me and my friends and told me he was gonna drive his friend's car along a very windy and dangerous road at a high speed and kept challenging my friend to a race. I told him not to because it would upset me and I'd be worried about him all night. After a while, I just walked away from him because I felt like I was going to cry... It's like... My boyfriend is the guy I see when he's not drunk and this sweet guy who I really have feelings for, but the guy I was seeing was someone I really didn't know.Anyway, my friend told him not to as well and that she wouldn't race him because he was so drunk. He then came over to me and held me close and said "Look at me" So I did. And he said " I will not drive. I promise you, I will not drive. Ok?" And he kissed me and said it again and said that he'd see me tomorrow.I don't know whether to be angry or upset or what but I really didn't know whether to believe him mainly... I care about him so much and when he's not drunk he makes me so happy... but his drinking habits scare me and I'm sitting at home now wondering where the f*ck he is...How should I deal with this?
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female
reader, PsyCookie  +, writes (9 August 2008):
 You're welcome. I'm so happy this helped you.
A
female
reader, bubbloo24 +, writes (9 August 2008):
bubbloo24 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for the advice, it's really helped a lot and sorted out my head a bit.
He didn't drive in the end so I told him how much I appreciated him taking what I had said on board.
Thanks again!
Bubbloo24
xx
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A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (4 August 2008):
Go talk to your boyfriend and express your concern about what he did. Tell him what you wrote here and express sincerity in his words.
When you do this, try to choose your words wisely. Try to be careful to not sound like you're accusing him of anything. Also, if you start getting mad, try to calm down and after keep talking to him. Express sincerity and tell him everything you felt when he committed this behavior and how you would like to help him.
He said something to you that actually stroke to me to see him differently than most guys: he immediately went up to you and told you he "would not drive". Most drunk guys would diss you and do whatever the hell they want, but for some reason he got some reason back and realize his stupidity. This speaks good for his character. This is also the reason why I think you talking to him would be good as for I think he would stop for you.
Now, I hope you have good luck and I hope your boyfriend comes around.
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