A
female
age
36-40,
*loveanna
writes:What do you think about my relationship... Can we make it? I've been with my man for 4years we havent gotten married but we do have a two year old.... Any how where can I begin... Well it's come to a point in our relationship where I cant take it anymore... I try to be strong for my little girl and for the fact that I want our family to stick it out... But to be honest I feel like it's a one sided relationship... My boyfriend hides everything from me... I dont even know the color of his cell phone? He finds the computer more entertaining than me... But what I dont understand is that he puts sooo much effort into loving his daughter? He loves to be with her? This is the part that kills me.... That I dont want to lose him because he is a great father to my little girl... HOwever he hurts me sooo much... I'm sooo confused and Im sooo lost I cant finacailly take care of my daugghter I've been taking care of her sense she was born... I dont have a job... and if we were to split up I want full custody of my little girl... Ive been the one who has taken care of her sense day one I dont want to lose the most important thing in my life... And he is pretty well taken cared of fincailly... What do I do? I love him sooo much and wish he could see what I see.. And embrace what could be a great relationship....
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female
reader, Artistry +, writes (14 October 2008):
 Hi there, My first question would be, could you get him to go to couple counseling sessions with you? If not, you have to decide, can you go on without any emotinal support? Even if he loves your little girl, and it seems he does, if you are receiving nothing from him as a partner, then you are in an emotional abusive relationship. He seems to be keeping himself from you for some reason. I am assuming that you have talked to him about how you feel , if not you need to have along talk with him, lay out how you feel and ask him to try to change, if he does not wnat to or doesn't, then it's up to you. You can find a job, if you put your mind to it, do not be frightened to go forward. There are places that have daycare centers on site, you could also look for a job at a daycare center, and your child could be with you there. There are solutions, but you must be willing to look for them, to better your life. With the job in your pocket, I would stay wit him, until I saved some money, at least a thousand dollars, and then, if he still hasn't changed, decide what you and your daughter's future will be. He should pay child support for his child, and he should be able to see her, but let your decision be based on what you think is best for you and your child, you are the adult, he will still love the child. Take care and good luck to you. Stay in touch.
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