A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: On several occasions, my boyfriend has admitted that he is not very emotional and has problems expressing his emotions and relating to other's emotions. The longer I'm with him, the more I see this. He did something and it hurt my feelings. When I approached him about it, he seemed shocked and immediately apologized several times. It seemed like he was very sorry and I felt bad for even bringing it up.He is also not very romantic. There is very little gift giving from him, though I've given him things on several occasions. Sometimes, by what he says, it seems like he tries to be romantic but, again, has a difficult time expressing it.Don't get me wrong- he isn't completely emotionless and he is no jerk. It's obvious that he loves me and he is quite innocent (or a little clueless, maybe...) and I doubt he would do anything on purpose to hurt me. But sometimes his actions, or lack of, make me feel like I'm not important to him. I also brought this up recently and he said I was the most important thing to him, he just had trouble showing it.I sincerely love him, but I'm just trying to figure out how this is going to work. I'm a passionate, romantic, cheesy, sentimental, sometimes jealous type. He, on the other hand, is a blunt, what-you-see-is-what-you-get type of person, though he does have a goofy sense of humor and is fun to be around.How can I learn to relate and live with this personality type
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 November 2014):
first thing I would suggest is that you get a copy of the book "the five languages of love"
I saw my husband much as you describe your boyfriend and that book helped me understand how his actions tell me he loves me and how I can tell him I love him. I'm a cheesy use words kind of girl and he's all about the "actions speak louder than words" kind of guy.. NOT a good fit till you learn to speak each others Love language.
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