A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: i am in a dilema i met a guy last May, we hit it off straight away, started seein each other end of August last year just casual we are both divorced,i have two daughters he has a son. However i have since found out that he split from his live in partner, who then came back because she was pregnant they had tests it is his child, he did not tell any work colleages about the baby. He is not happy with his partner he says he feels trapped. We have remained very close friends we still have feelings for each other, but i did not find out about the baby until recently he now has another child, my eldest is at uni so we are both in our forties i am unsure where to go with this relationship it is very complicated and could do with some expert advice.
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divorce, his ex, trapped Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx for the reply my question was probably a little foggy but he only told me about the baby a week before it was born, it is now a month old i have tried on numerous occasions to back off he has asked me not to. but when i do he calls texts etc, but every time i ask him about our relationship he changes the subject but makles comments if i so much as speak to another guy i am so confused, obviously if i had known the situation before i would have backed off straight away. i feel as if i am in a no win situation, again he has told people that he is unhappy with the situation at home, which is adding to my confusion
A
female
reader, bemused +, writes (3 March 2009):
Hi hun. I am no expert but you are not kidding when you mention that this is an additonal complication in your relationship. You mention it was casual. Was it then by mutual consent that he continued to see( and sleep with obviously) his ex. No matter what backtracking he is doing and what he is telling you, I think it would be safe to say she is still in his life. She is now having a baby. If I were you I would back away from this for awhile and see what happens. He is the father of this child so birth control a foregone conclusion.
I think you have to assess what you want. If you are looking for a committed relationship, this does not sound like much fun for you. If you are only looking for something casual it might work.
If you decide to back away, get busy with your own interest and pursuits. Someone better suited will come your way.
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