A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 1 year has had a past form his teenage years where he writes and fantasizes on online portals, about sex with his mom. I was never aware of this and have recently came across this profile of his. He has used her real name there and I even suspect that its his mom in one of the photos.As I dug deeper, I found that in his chats for the past 6 months, he has been using my name in chats, showing pictures of "his gf" and asking them to "talk dirty" about her (me). He has used my real name there. When I confronted him, he says he is now getting over it. He says it was a dark past and using my name was just to make himself guilty into coming over sex talking like that. He also says he has used my photo to show it to a random chat once.Presently, I am very scared. I have deleted all my photos in his system. He is urging me to reconsider him, pleading that he is a changed person. But I am bewildered. I have loved him like crazy and saw a very bright future with him. But this incident has shaken me. I feel this person is different from the one I know. He has done this sex chatting using my name even when we were happily committed.What does it mean? What should I do now? Please help.
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male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (10 December 2014):
Would you trust a guy with incest fantasies to raise your children?
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (10 December 2014):
Get out of there fast. He sounds abnormal and he doesnt respect you to be using your name and photos like that. Worse still he made up a pathetic excuse for doing it. Run.
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A
male
reader, TGFD55 +, writes (10 December 2014):
Question, and you dont have to answer here even though its an anonymous forum for advice. Have you ever, even once, no matter what age you were at the time, had a "taboo" or "deviant" fantasy that society would make you an outcast for so to speak?
I belige we ALL have fantasy that we wouldnt want anyone else to know, for the fact that we don't nt know how to feel about our own fantasy. The Oedipous theory is scientific fact. We know this. So men are always blamed by society for being "pigs", but cmon, at some point those Moms KNOW the son is a little too old for that bath, but continue to do it. It just a human feeling to be wanted and even "get away" with something if we can.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2014): This is seriously dangerous.
Walk away.
Contact the moderators of teh site he uses and ask the to remove your info.
One other thing, and I know I may be overreacting, I'd contact a lawyer or an assotiation that helps people with legal matters. He may be prone to obsessions and you must be prepared to take steps in case he gets fixated on you.
I doubt it'll come to that, but you never know.
I know it's a touchy subject, but I'd certanly ask someone I trust for support.
Good luck and be strong.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 December 2014):
 No, walk away you are fantasy fodder nothing more. What he is doing can RUIN your future. By using YOUR name and YOUR picture. I would actually contact the moderators/owners of those sites and get your name/photos removed.
As for the whole Oedipus complex (sexual attraction to his mom) - he must have a VERY odd relationship with his mom, and... very odd view of women in general.
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