A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating a guy now for almost two years who is 10 yrs. my senior. I will be 50 next month, and he will be 60 in October. I was separated from my ex-husband for almost 7 yrs. before I divorced him. I had been celibate during the whole time we were separated,so, when my divorce was final, I was ready to move on with my life and have a relationship. The problem is that the man I'm dating has ED. He's afraid to try Viagra because he's afraid it won't work. Anyway, we're unable to have sex that we both would love to have, but, he can't. It's a very touchy subject, but, we haven't even tried in the last 10 months. He doesn't even want to kiss me or touch me because it arouses him and he can't do anything about it. I don't know what to do but try to find something to take away my sexual desire. What do you think?Desperate in TN
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2011): Been there got the TshirtGet him to go to the doctors, in a gentle way, he has to stop burying his head in the sand.He has to do it for both of you.My then b/f had problems because of diabetes.He was 52 at the time.He covered his problem with bravado,arrogance and flirting constantly - he liked to have a bimbo on his arm to give a smokescreen- so I didn't last long!
A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (14 August 2011):
 I am not sure there is a clear-cut answer for you here. You are missing a key and vital component of your relationship -- physical intimacy. Whatever his reasons or excuses, he isn't keeping up with his end of the bargain in providing that.I would urge him to be seen by a doctor. While he is on the older side, he should still be able to have an erection. Usually ED is a symptom of more serious physical ailments such as high blood pressure, overweight, diabetes, poor circulation, depression, etc. At his age though, a man's sexual appetite does seriously decline, however.The statement he doesn't want to try viagra is a cop-out and his indifference to the problem is also troubling in the fact that you've brought up the issue and he doesn't want to deal with it.Ultimately, I think you have some soul searching to do: If this man doesn't want to provide physical affection to you, I think you need to ask yourself whether this relationship can work out in the long run. While you've learned to live without sex, it does sounds like you are feeling cheated and let down (let's face it, that's why you are posting here). As this relationship progresses, you may find it more and more difficult to live with that. Is this man truly worth that sacrifice? He may be, but ultimately that's for you to decide.Good luck.
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A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (14 August 2011):
 he is not meeting you half way here is he? even though he is the one with the problem. he could at least TRY Viagra, and what is with the no kissing and hugging?? that's not right! just coz he can't get hard it does not mean that you should be starved of all affection. i am sorry but i think your relationship problem is MORE than his inability to get hard. has he seen his doctor to rule out a cause for his ED? could be something hormonal, medical or even psychological. being 60 years old is not a definitive reason. his unwillingness to get help and the fact that he just expects you to stick with him even though he gives you no physical affection is definitely not okx
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female
reader, sammy1986 +, writes (14 August 2011):
i would urge him to go to the doctors they maybe something they can do to help him
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