A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Ok, a few separate isues going on here, I am an 18-year old girl, in my first proper relationship with a 21-year old guy. We have been together for 9 months now. In hthe beginning, he was so much fun,we would have sex all over the place and have good times together...Before I came on the scene, he had recently broken up with his first serious gf, Nicky. They had been together for 1.5 years(Basically from the start of uni, we are all at uni together) Once he got with me, he treated me perfectly nicely until lately. then he got lazy(Not wanting to go anywhere), critical of me(You're wearing to much makeup, always noticing my spots, making fun of my slightly chubby belly) and these days, due to some random allergy and eczema he gets every summer, we can't have sex as it hurts him to..which I was fine with, as I wouldn't want him to suffer. however, he hasn't gone down on me for months or even touched me sexually. When he was ok to have sex just before his allergy started, he seemed to just want oral sex from me and if not that then a quick in-and-out. Now there is no sex..and everytime I have confronted him about it, he says that with him itching everywhere, sex is the last thing on his mind. I often give him blow jobs but he avoids even going there, says he doens't like the taste or the texture of women's bits!I am starting to feel really unattractive, what do I do?I honestly do not feel desired and am getting very sexually frustrated.To top it all off, Nicky has been in touch with him and wanted to "talk" about her problems as she was having the same prooblems that she always did and my bf "the only one who can deal with them"When he asked me if he could see Nicky, i agreed to, with a heavy heart but the 5 hours they spent together alone in his flat just having fun(which he told me that they did, the problems she was having were just an excuse to see him) were excruciating. Now she texts him all the time, she even called him yesterday and he didn't take the call,I have a feeling it was because I was there. Then, again, l;ast night just as i was about to get used to the idea of them just "chilling", I found an old letter(2004) from his ex. I didn't read it, I just read the "Love Nicky" at the bottom....Also, he can be very insensitive when his friends are there, whenever I talk I get ignored by him and by them...And whenever I have a problem with him, he just blames my age!!!!!!!!That i am too young to understand.What do I do??Why do I feel like I am being ignored by my bf?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2007): I was in a similiar situation like you with a man i went out with for 4 years. Everything at the begining was fun and good up until the last year where he just went off sex.
I tried everything to increase his libido and such and i felt very unattractive and incredibly he ignored me on various occasions until i started to complain. Eventually after a while it broke us up. My mother always told me that if a man cannot satisfy you that is no basis for a relationship because you will look else where and even though i didnæt cheat on him my heart wasn't there anymore.
This wont end well for your self esteem and your best just leaving it. If ever bring your age into any arguement again you just tell him that he is the one who is too immature to explain things properly and to try to just fob you off with your age. He knew how old you were when you first started dating so he knew you were old enough for a relationship he should treat you like a mature enough partner and even though he may feel you arent understanding something because of your age its his job to explain. Other wise history repeats itself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question
Thanks for taking the time to reply tasha556, I am not sure if I want to dump him,when I think about the good times, there are loads. And i am already too in love with him. Is there no way i can get his attention(not by doing something silly) or even make him understand that I need to be loved and wanted?
Thanks
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A
female
reader, tasha556  +, writes (7 June 2007):
 if seems as though your bf doesnt really care about you and your feelings. this may not be what you want to read but i honestly think your are wasting your time with him. if i was you i would dump him and move on hes not worth it your young and your definitly find someone else. gd luck xx
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