A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have had feelings for my sister in law for five years and last week we had sex. Im very confused. We both agreed that it was a once off and it would never happen again. We are both married and very happy in our relationship but have been flirting continuously. In a moments stupidity we thought if we just did it and got it out of the way we could move on. We are moving on I dont think of her in the same way anymore. Not because the sex was bad or anything just as we decided move on. Now im worried about my wife. She would not handle it well if she found out. What do I do?
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flirt, move on, sister in law Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Main Man +, writes (23 May 2009):
 Unless you want a divorce don't tell your wife about having sex with sister in law. You have both agreed that it was a 1 off & are going move on.
A
female
reader, Miss_Objective  +, writes (26 February 2009):
You made your bed and now you must lie in it. You should try being a man and confess what happened between you and your sister-in-law to your wife. Good luck. You'll need it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2008): i can understand the feelings u have towards ur sister in law and its difficult some times even to let go and on top of that u had sex with her or want more i think if u want continue this its not going to result in anything fruit full in the loooong term... BUT DONT TELL UR WIFE ABOUT ANY OF THIS she may get hurt badly and talk to the sister in law frankly about this issue openly for the future sake and if u wanna have fun again naked u should do it at ur own risk ........
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008): I'm in the same sistuation like yours, I'm married for 5 yrs with 2 kids. For the last 2 yrs I have been notice my wife older sister, I mean she's so hot and sexy I dream of having sex with her on her bed, bathroom or even in her SUV (her husband bought for her) every time we come visit her. She is also married with 2 kids we're both are in our mid thirty. Sometimes we just look at each other and smile a lot without no body notice, she would cook my favorite food and invite my family over. Should I tell her how I think about her???
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): no dont i have been have been married for 16 years and love my wife but i also have been having sex with another woman also for about ten years (she is a old friend who married the wrong guy)ive never told my wife and never will i have we are very discrete.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008): I had sex with my sister in law 12 years ago and I am still paying for it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): The only reason you would want to tell her is to get it off your conscience. Tell your Rabbi or minister and then get some counseling. You and the sis-in-law should have thought through the consequences before your encounter
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2007): no need to tell to wife and feel guilty. enjoy.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): I've had sex with my sister-in-law, and I can tell you it's great. However, keep in mind this is my wife's brother's wife, not her sister. The guilt factor? Well, I remind myself how bad she is in bed and how she refuses to get marriage counseling and treatment for her ballistic agent problems. Yeah, I know. It's an excuse, but still. It works wonders. Makes me reminisce and her sweat smell and soft skin and our bodies rubbing against each other as we made hot, wet, love in the backseat of her SUV (the one her husband bought her).
I have no regrets. My wife is cruel to me, and she deserves it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2007): I think you should not dare to tell her. These kind of things are natural. I mean liking between opposite sexes are very often. I dont regard this as a cheating, unless it does not continue further.
Now what you do is to see your wife sister lesser. Ignore her and explain her that was all.
Do not develop your feelings towards your wife sister.
I did that same years ago. She was half my age. we did sex.
But later she too got married and we decided not to see each other for some time, unless she develops some love for her husband. Twice she called me for another sex, but I was bold to say no. Then she too repulsed.
and now she is happy. mating with own wife or husband is usual and we liked to mate otherwise, since it was hot and nasty but it is just a matter of control .
So if it happen just stop now ot u will lose interest in your own wife or husband.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007): Say nothing about it as it will hurt her deeply and change both of your lives forever. If you love your wife, take every opportunity you have going forward to show her that. Use this as your incentive to treat her like all wives wish their husbands would. It is the least you can do at this point. Turn this into a positive thing by making you relationship with your wife better, stronger and more exciting than it has ever been.
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A
female
reader, superfly  +, writes (11 June 2007):
Don't pass this burden to your wife....You should accept this burden b/c you created it, and you should deal with it...not your wife!!
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A
female
reader, superfly +, writes (11 June 2007):
If you do, understand at the moment you decide to do this, consider your wife nolonger your wife.....and don't expect her to resolve your situation, b/c her sister stabbed her in the back, and a person like yourself had sex with her sister....If you want to preserve your marriage, don't tell her....otherwise, face the reality of what she's going to bring to your life.Don't hurt her by telling her how stupid and lack of respect of a person you are, by having sex with her sister. Noone deserves this reality...so keep it secret.I mean do you have any dignity?....You commit adultry and now you want help from her.....She should leave you not for cheating on her with her sister, but she should leaves you b/c you are so freakin SELFISH, and your selfishness is destroys all peace!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2007): I am inclined to agree with the first poster lillybeth....If you tell your wife then it is really to only dump your guilt onto her, I am betting her sister won't tell her if you don't. Obviously the sister in law is competitive with her sister, and this is more about her and about you then it is about your wife.....you both really deserve each other, which is where you will be if you spill the beans, alone together sitting on the curb, which is where you decidedly deserve to be....but I am on your wife's side, and I say this will devestate her, so keep it to yourself and vow never to do it again and to kiss the ground your wife walks on for the rest of her life.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (7 June 2007):
 Cheating on your wife is bad enough, but her sister?!!! If you don't tell your wife, the sister-in-law may spill her guts, maybe not today maybe not tomorrow but some day. Guilt can gnaw away at a person until they have to confess to find a little relief even if it hurts someone else. Since neither one of you gave a moment's thought to your wife when you had your animal sex then I'd say it probably will come out sooner or later because you both are very selfish, weak people. Tell her and face the consequences like a man, (if that is at all possible).
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