A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend doesn't seem to want me. He has no reaction to me wearing lingerie, he never touches me, there is zero foreplay. I have done oral, hand jobs, anything i can to please him but it is never reciprocated. I am not heavy set, have been told I am beautiful. At first our sex life was great, now i am lucky once a week. He has no sex drive and makes me feel as though i am ugly. It drives me to insanity wondering what i can do, what have i done. What does he want from me. It just hurts. sex isnt everything but it is a big deal to me. We sit around arguing n watching tv. That is our life. We dont live together, n at this point i don't know what to do or how to feel. We've been together 1 1/2 yrs. I dont want to feel like this anymore, but i love him. Im frustrated to no end. He doesnt want me to mastubate in fear i will think of someone else.. Yet i wouldnt. I want him n him only. What kind of life is this.. I don't know what to do.. So confused.
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foreplay, hand-job, sex drive, sex life Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (29 March 2012):
 Well what changed?? When did he begin to show a different side of himself? Usually there's a trigger in the relationship that can cause a good relationship to go bad. Whether that's boredom, an underlying frustration about something relating to the relationship, or maybe something a bit more deeper. He's apparently not happy in the relationship- and it's causing a break in your sex life. My advice to you is to communicate with him to find out what's really going on. Find out what issues he has- and try to work on them. Otherwise you will continue to be frustrated not only in the bedroom... but outside of it as well. If you think he would be o.k. with going to couples counseling, then I HIGHLY recommend that you both seek the advice of a trained professional. A third opinion can work wonders because it allows a person to view things from a different perspective... even if what the counselor is saying is something you've been arguing about all along. :^)Best Wishes!
A
female
reader, babu3u +, writes (28 March 2012):
 Has his sex drive been low from the start?
I completely understand how you are feeling. I had the same issue with ex. I have a very high sex drive and I would be rejected by him over and over again. I was super frustrated and I felt ugly, unloved it was the worse. At least I had some kind of sex release by masturbating but hw won't even let you do that! I know sex isn't the most important thing about a relationship but its still something that is important for someone with a high sex drive. If you continue in this relationship and he doesn't even try to please you sexually and won't even let you masturbate, you'll just either get tired of him and cheat, or believe that your sexual needs can't be satisfied and live a frustrating life with him.
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