A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have been with my boyfriend just under 3yrs,recently i was very upset crying uncontrolably yet my boyfriend just sat there and totaly ignored me,he said he loves me more than anything yet how can he sit and ignore me like that?if it was him crying i would instantly hug and hold him tight,make him know how much i really love him,is this normal behaviour from a man or his he cold and callous and not really into loving me,im so confused Reply to this Question
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male
reader, rcn  +, writes (5 November 2007):
 Some men have mixed feelings about crying. I do agree with the other posters, but some guys can't handle crying. It's hard to explain, but I'll try.
When you get in a fight with a boy, and start crying. The boy tries to hug you and comfort you and you tell him "don't touch me, get the hell away, etc." and maybe even hit him for trying, boys sometimes if you're just generally upset wonder if being hugged is something you need or is it going to cause them to get hit and yelled at. Which is the boys fault, because most don't realize they could open their mouth and ask.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2007): Some men have this reaction that to cry is a weakness and he may not know what to do. You need to have a chat with him and explain that his backing would be helpful. Even just a few kind words and a cuddle would help. He may not know just what to do. Educate him.
take care
xx
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A
male
reader, dapone 1 +, writes (5 November 2007):
 Hello.
as a male i agree with you he should have cuddled you, but not all people are the same, he may have wrongly believed that if he had of approached you, he may have made matters worse, some guys think in this vain and will let you cry alone, i dont think that he loves you any less, but you need to let him know he is ok to cuddle you when you are upset, he is as my friend has said, inexperienced in this matter.
hope this is helpful to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2007): he may love you but most guys arent used to seeing people crying and sad because when a guy is with his freinds they never talk about there feelings. the conversation is on things that dont really matter. i think his reaction was do to hesitation from iexperience.
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