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My boyfriend cheated, but now he is back and I am confused

Tagged as: The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 August 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 23 August 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, *ucker4love writes:

Hey all,

I met the love of my life when i was 19. He was everything i had every dreamt about and much more. We were 2gether 3yrs when he went out 1 nite got drunk and slept with some1 else. He came straight home and told me wot he had done askin 4 4givness but i coundn't 4give him. I was heartbroken and i mean heartbroken i didn't think my heart would ever heal. He moved 2 America 8 months later which sorta helped me get over him and eventually i did. At the start of the year he came home again. He had always kept in contact with my friend's bf so when he came back they started hanging out again. He asked my friend if he could get my number, she asked me and i said i didn't want him 2 have it but her bf had other ideas and gave it 2 him. He started txting me and i will admit i was very hostile 2wards him. R friends thought was should meet face 2 face so they set us up without telling us. He told me he was sorry 4 wot he had done that it was the worst mistake of his life and if he could turn back time he would was kinda everything i expected him 2 say. 2wards the end of the nite we were getting on better and i thought we were gonna b friends again. He started phoning and txting me more and my feelings 4 him all came flooding back which i didn't want. He told me that he loves me and that he never stopped and if im completely honest i feel the same way about him but i haven't told him and i don't want 2 know.I know i'm scared of getting hurt again but i don't know wot 2 do.

Any advice is welcome

View related questions: drunk, heartbroken

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2007):

yeah i no it hurts to be cheated on. but if you love somebody they can chance trust me ive learned the hard wayy but being with somebody who makes you happy is very important. i dunno give things another shot . if things dont work out well then they dont i dunno everybody deserves a second chance. I have cheated on my ex 2 . i still love him and it was the worst mistakes i have ever made in my life i regret it so much i love him. and i no that your boyfriend probably feels the same way shit just happens.

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A male reader, Dazzerg United Kingdom +, writes (21 August 2007):

Dazzerg agony auntI think you need to somewhat go with the flow here. You have said that you were getting on better and were probably going to end up friends. Obviously it is going to take time for the you to be able to trust him again and you shouldn't rush into something that you feel you are not ready for; rather you should take your time almost starting afresh.

You need to rediscover what you love in each other and hopefully in time that will grow over what happened. Good luck and take care.

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A female reader, confusedchick United States +, writes (21 August 2007):

You are lucky girl! It seems like this was a one time thing and that he is truly sorry! He admitted it to you... that same night... which takes alot of guts!

I would talk to him about your feelings... it seems like your still in love with him and I believe you can make it work! He needs to assure you that it would never happen again! If you can get over the past and the one mistake then your future looks bright... but if you keep dwelling in the past mistakes then you will drive yourself crazy!

Good Luck!!

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