A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have a boyfriend for 8 years and were inlove,until one day he told me that his going out with other girl and we talk about it and he tell me to understand him and he want a space from me,,then i gave him his space but he refuse to let me go because he still love me,he only want a space but he still want me then i said yes because i still love him,im always beside him when he had many problems,when his happy im still there...but one day he met my friend and he never told me that his going out with my friend.my friend told me everything that my boyfriend courting her,i was shocked,,,then i talk to him i told him that i know everything...i was shocked when he told me this "get lost i dont need you and love you just accept it dont disturb us",,it was like a boom for me in my heart and mind i dont know what to say infront of him it just my tears falling out my tears and i dont know what to do.he left me crying...pls help me,,,its a month now but i still love him...is it really my fault?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (9 January 2009):
 Is it your fault your BF is an ass? No.
Is it your fault that your friend is a cow? No.
That is double betrayal. They deserve each other.
I'm sorry you are hurting, but you need to stop blaming yourself. And cut all communications with him, he's a piece of work. If he's been blaming you then please don't listen, he knows he messed up but he doesn't want to own it. He wants you to own it, and you don't have to. No way.
And you still love him. It's normal. You spend 8 years loving him pouring feelings into your relationship, love is not like faucet where you can just turn it off. But over time you will come to see him for what he truly is and you will move on.
Concentrate on YOU now, things you always wanted to do but never did. Get a massage, join a gym, try the best you can not to dwell on it.
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