A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi, I'm 14 and constantly have recently, (a few months ago) ended a 3 year relationship. Eh we still have feelings for eachother and whatever but I know I should not get involved with him again, and I don't plan to. But I feel like since he has been the only guy in my life that mattered for the past 3 years, no one would have any interest in me. Please don't tell me that I am young and have a lot of time to meet someone and yadda yadda yadda... I've heard it all before. I just really feel alone in my life as if no one wants to be with me... at all. I have my friends but we're going through rough times so I rarely have them around anymore, and I've lost my absolute best friend friend who I could tell everything for a stupidi reason. I feel so alone all of the time and it's terrible. I've basically been alone my whole life but when I had my boyfriend around it felt better... but I am beginning to think that I was meant to be alone and I hate it. I just need someone and I do not want to force anything but I don't know what to do.Anyone, and I mean anyone please answer.All replies will be appreciated.
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male
reader, rcn +, writes (8 October 2007):
This really does happen to a wide variety of people of all different ages. If sounds as if the depression was present before beginning your relationship with your boyfriend. Boys cannot make you happy. No one can. You need to build yourself for you. Build who you are, your own identity and confidence. By doing that you'll begin being happy just because you are that special person you are meant to be. Then you can date and instead of expecting them to fix you, you'd be sharing your happiness with someone special, and sharing that time because it's a choice not because you feel as if your missing something.
If the depression continues, I'd see a doctor. I had too, like I said it happens at all ages. Mine was at 25 years old. I developed Major Depressive Disorder, it's not fun, but with much work, I'm happy just being me. I don't date because I choose not too, and have too many goals I want to accomplish before considering it. But when I do, it's because I choose to share my life and time with someone special.
Take care, I wish you the best.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2007): I don't want to be all like a spokes person..but have you considered god..you may laugh but sereusly i felt for year a big gap in my life but once i became a free methodist christian..he filled that place..and i think you may be suffering from depresion..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2007): "You are in control of your own happiness"
You are not meant be alone unless you keep telling yourself that you are. Take this opportunity to really get to know yourself and your life ahead of you. When you are on the right path the right guy and the right friends will find you.
The thing that I found that really helped me when I had this lonely feeling around your age is to: write about it, write down all your thoughts and feelings day to day or when you feel at the most extreme, it can really clear your mind. Also, volunteering to help others who need it can be VERY satisfying (and bonus, community work helps for future school applications). Even just helping out your family with stuff around the house or doing something special for a friends can speak wonders. You'll see that you aren't as alone as you may think.
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A
female
reader, XxAngelDust89xX +, writes (8 October 2007):
You may hate hearing that you have your whole life ahead of you, but it is true. Please dont be offended, but you need to boost your self esteem. You need to try being more independent, try going it alone for a while. After i broke up with my first boyfriend, I felt so alone like there was no one there for me and that ther would never be. one of my teachers told me to try being single for a while, and I found out something. You are never alone as long as you have yourself. you should be the main person you depend on, you need to be your own strength and your own best friend. if you cant depend on yourself how cna other people? Belive it or not, most boys like girls that are stron independent, and ac like the dont need anybody, its part of their appeal. most guys like to have girl who full of confidence and is sure of herself. (it makes them look good) the more confidence you have the sexier you are give it a try.
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