A
female
age
41-50,
*iketso
writes:Hi...my ex's new girlfriend is harassing me. Should i inform him of her behaviour. We have a child together. I have kept quiet for while now but it gets worse as the days go on....should i tell him and if so how should i inform without sounding harsh? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Diketso +, writes (7 April 2008):
Diketso is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi everyone.i did it i told him and i didnt get a response,but that girl got a response.he dumped her.but got a new 1 same time,what bugs me about this guy is that he is just not stable & wants to expose our child to these crazies.i refuse obviously.thanx 4 ur help.
A
female
reader, duskyrowe  +, writes (15 February 2008):
 Your welcome sometimes I do long replies and sometimes I do short replies depending whether I have got typist's cramp or not lol. Good Luck hun Dusky xxx.
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A
female
reader, Diketso +, writes (15 February 2008):
Diketso is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI would like to thank those who replied (particularly rcn, duskyrowe, laura1318, irish49). Your answers came so quickly. I'm greatful cause they helped, I will definitely update you about the outcome.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (15 February 2008):
 If you have tried and cannot handle her by yourself , you would need your ex help.
Just ask him to tell her to keep away from you .You don't want to bother her and hope she does the same. He will know what to do.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2008): Excuse my error in the statement I wrote in your posting. Please change the following:
"You both need to stand against her as a united front and tolerate this"
to
"You both need to stand against her as a united front and NOT tolerate this"
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2008): Yes, you most definitely tell him. And then you ask 'him' to tell her to 'back off'. She's his ex and he has a responsibility to provide you and his child with a happy life. And a man polices his family's borders. He beeds to take care of this woman once and for all and if he can't do it...and she keep sharassing you...call the police as suggested below. You both need to stand against her as a united front and tolerate this. You are dealing with a manipulative, troubled, needy ex gf. She is thinking that she has a chance again if she can get you out of the picture. The only way you can likely end this with his ex gf..is for your bf to tell her outright and firmly, that he will not ever be involved with her again. Period. He needs to give her the final word..give her some long overdue 'closure' so she will move on and find someone else that makes her happy. But other than that, you have no control over how other people conduct their lives. So my advice is to be honest with him and tell him that it unsettles you, to see how this woman hovers around like a vulture, ready to zoom in on you and harass you, simply because she still has heartfelt feelings invested in him.
She doesn't sound satisfied with her own life and pining away for your bf, gives her hope and purpose. Sad, isn't it? And added to that, the confusion and pain that she's experiencing within herself---she desperately needs...some happiness. She is going about it the wrong way. She has to find her own self-love and dignity, first. Only then, will she realize the futility of what she is doing and will have the strength abd pride to 'move on'. If she finds happiness and falls in love again herself, she will be more accepting of your bf's happiness with you. But yes, tell him-relationships are all about caring and generosity.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (14 February 2008):
Call the police and get warrant served on this bunny boiler.
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (14 February 2008):
 It's not being harsh letting him know what's going on. Just tell him what she's been doing and it's beginning to really bother you.
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