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My BF wants to have sex, but I don't think either of us are ready.

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Question - (25 June 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 25 June 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, *elymuse writes:

Well hi. So me and my boyfriend have been dating for a couple weeks now and I really like him. He likes to move

really fast and I am fine with that you know. But now he is bugging me about going all the way and I'm ready but I am not so sure he is.

He tells me he is, but when we start to do a lil

I sense him hesitate. I know he is not telling me something and I don't think he is ready and he is thinking that I don't like him any more. I have tried sitting him down and talking with him a lot but he says he's ready.

What should I do believe him or go with my gut and wait for a hidden truth?

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A female reader, Fiona xxx United Kingdom +, writes (25 June 2009):

Fiona xxx agony auntI think there is a lot of pressure these days about sex and everybody seems to want sex earlier and earlier. There is no harm in waiting a couple of more weeks or a month or two, whatever time it takes for you both to feel OK with things. Perhaps he has been hurt before, who knows or perhaps it's his firt time and he is nervous.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2009):

There is no law that says you need to have sex within a few weeks, in fact it would be better to get to know each other properly first and then you would either decide not to, or feel less nervous. It's harder for a guy to admit he isn't ready than a girl, so tell him you are not.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2009):

Always go with your gut. Your instinct says something isn't right, so clear it up!

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