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female
age
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anonymous
writes: My bloke of two years said i don't do enough during love making. I thought everything was ok. He says i don't touch him as much as i used to do. I just lie there and let him do everything. It's not true and has made me feel so conscious. We do always seem to end up with him on top but i thought he liked it that way. Seems he is getting bored. I don't understand men at all. why don't they say something sooner instead of waiting until you a very unopportune moment. I feel really down about it. Any ideas or has anyone else every experienced this. What do I do? I thought things were great! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AngelofLove  +, writes (30 December 2006):
 When he least expects, gets some kinky boots on with a sexy babydoll top. Dont even drag him upstairs, get on top of him whilst he sits on the sofa.
It is natural that after 2 years, sex is not as exciting and could be seen as routine by either partner. But it takes two to tango and to keep it up!
Plan to be impulsive and take more control, the message is giving you is to be more active so go for it!
Good luck xxx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2006):
bummer to hear. On the other hand the girl just laying there is the worst.
You may want to look at both your expectations around sex. Does it always occur on certain days and in a certain way- like at 10pm with the lights out? Do you know exactly how long it is supposed to last and how it is supposed to end? Ever in the shower in the morning etc...?
How about you take him to dinner, have him bang back a couple of smart martinis, get him a little drunk and take him to see Apocalypto and give him a hand job in the theatre? Never saw that coming!
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A
female
reader, Hag +, writes (29 December 2006):
You might want to take a look at what you are feeling and how you respond during sex. Don't be afraid to ask him what he would like you to do, but use some of your own creativity. Try to become adventurous and spontaneous.
Get some ideas in your head and dwell on them long enough that it really turns you on to think about them, then go with it and take complete charge of the situation. Try not LETTING him take charge. Use your own initiative without going outside your personal limits of taste.
After two years you should not be afraid to advance on your man with your own desires. If you are uncomfortable with your own initiative (which appears to be exactly what he is requesting), then your relationship is not true to who you really are.
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A
female
reader, kellyO +, writes (29 December 2006):
 Hi there,
i agree with you it is upsetting especially when the relationship has been on for two years. but maybe u can try and look at it from another angle. Maybe he wants to try different things and he is encouraging you to be more open to ideas to spice up sex. Talk to him, about what his fantasies and what he wants. there are so many ways u can spice up your sex life, u can get some nice lingerie that really works!
Goodluck dear.
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