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female
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anonymous
writes: Help!!!I have been with my boyfriend for 4 months and he always aus that he loves me. he says that without me he would die. he says tha if he'd loose me he'd kill himself. I met this other guy at school and i like him and i know he likes me too and he asked me out and i didnt know what to say. i want to but im scared that my boyfriend might try to hurt himself....what should i do?? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Toria +, writes (28 September 2006):
 You can't stay with someone you don't want to be with anymore just because you fear for what they may do.
I would try and talk to him regarding his threats and harm himself and tell him that this scares you and because of this it is pushing you away from him and wanting anything with him and try to encourage him into getting some help with this problem as he seems to hold more problems beneath the surface that probably aren't regarding you.
Good luck :o)
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2006): Thats called emotional black mail... My ex tried that with me too but I was stronger than that and walked out on him to show him I wasn't weak enough to believe him! If he loves you but knows there's no future with you he will come round - ok admitedly it might take a while. You have to get on with your life!! I say go for it with this new guy that asked you out and be happy!! There's no point in living in fear of what he might or might never do!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2006): I think your boyfriend is either depressed and suicidal or he is saying these things out of a deep insecurity that you will leave him for another...regardless this is NOT love nor is it a healthy relationship for you. You need to tell someone, a school counselor, his mother or some other responsible adult what he is threatening because he needs help. Sometimes guys like this can even turn violent and abusive towards the object of their affection if spurned, sometimes, so be careful to protect yourself as well. Don't stay with him over this kind of manipulation, it is not right.
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male
reader, Yos  +, writes (28 September 2006):
 You cannot stay in a relationship for that reason. He is emotionally blackmailing you. What is more, he is showing that he likely has some kind of psychological problems.
He is also probably exaggerating.
Either way there is no future for you two with this hanging over you.
You have to leave him. If you are able you might try to convince him to go to some kind of councelling. His behaviour is unhealthy and the sooner he looks at himself and tries to get help the better. Perhaps you could speak to his parents (or his best friends) and see if they can help him, if he won't listen to you.
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