A
female
,
anonymous
writes: i've been going out with this guy for 3 years,he has recently become possessive and is following me almost everywhere,he even knows my passwords!!!is this normal?? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (27 September 2006):
Have you done anything to cause this possesiveness he has gained?
If you haven't then there is no reason for him to have got like this but I would try talking to him as he may have got the wrong end of something and just needs to get reasurance from you to clear whatever it is out of his head, the longer it is left the worse it will get for you both.
Good luck :o)
A
female
reader, stina +, writes (26 September 2006):
Hey Anonymous,
No, this is not normal. You need to have a discussion with him about this and tell him your feelings and see about trying to work this out.
Has something happened recently that would cause him to lose trust in you? If you can't think of anything, then you need to ask him - maybe you did something unintentionally that upset him. Sometimes people aren't the best at talking about their feelings, so he might be hiding it. The only thing that's showing now is the cause of keeping his emotions bottled up. Who knows, it may have been something that happened a really long time ago that he's just focusing on now for some reason.
Or maybe you have new guy friends? Sometimes peopl can get very territorial about their partners when they feel threatened by someone else. Could this be why?
There's also a less "positive" reason that he might be acting this way. Sometimes if people have done something that they consider wrong, they get paranoid that their partner could do the same thing. What I mean is that if he cheated, he may think that you could or are cheating, as well, which is making him extremely possessive over you. **But I have no idea if this is what's running through his head and I don't even know if he cheated on you - it's just something I'm throwing out there.**
You both need to have a discussion about what the *both* of you can do to fix this - the key is working together on it. If you guys talk about this and nothing is resolved in the near future (or if he hasn't at least eased up a bit), I say that you should really think if you want to be with someone who's going to be doing this to you for the rest of your life.
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