A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: helpmy partner of 6 years has had enough of me.We both own the house, but he wants me to move out for awhile to give us/him a break, and see how we feel.I don't want to move out.I am 45yrs old and before i met my partner owned my own little house and car, but sold up to buy together.If he doesn't want us to work as a couple, i would rather be moving out to the place i am going to be living (wherever that may be)after finances have been sorted.I have a son who lives with me (from previous marriage) so moving out temporarily is not really satisfactory for him.Any advice as the situation is awful at the moment and he keeps going off to get away from me, but comes back then has another go at me.
View related questions:
a break Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, sleepyhollow +, writes (9 May 2007):
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!
Okay, you are both co-owners in the house, which means you don't have to go anywhere.
If he's the one wanting a break, he can very well move out and find someplace where he can have all the space he wants. If he doesn't respect you enough to do that much, it may be best to sell your interest in the house and buy another place and move out. If he can't afford to buy out your half of the house, it may be time to get a lawyer and force the sale and equitable distribution of the proceeds. You shouldn't have to put with such a demeaning and callous situation.
Rightfully, you should be pissed off at him for even thinking it was okay to ask you and your son to move out while he enjoys himself in the house that you also own. Talk about gall.
Take it from me... Your son is priority. Do what is right by your son, and your life will work out a little better.
A
female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (9 May 2007):
If it were me, I would have him move out. He SHOULD understand because you have a child and that to me is to much moving around. However, it does sound as though much is still not clear between the both of you. I think you really need to have a one on one talk with him and really find out IF you two are really going to work it out or not. In my opinion, when a spouse or other leaves for whatever reason, I personally feel as if they do not want to work it out period...otherwise, you stay AND work it out...together, whatever "it" is. BUT THAT IS ME. If there is an arguement or disagreement everytime, or you just don't want to "see" your significant other - for whatever reason, does that mean you leave your dwelling place each time and the person you supposably love?? That's what get's me. Also, if both of your names are on the house (or not), look what it says about leaving your dwelling IF you two should really split up and one leaves and the house is not sold yet. You could lose your part...varies by state/country I am sure - something like abandenment I think. That's if it was to get messy which I pray not for your sake. I am not sure if partner means husband or boyfriend so just a tad confused. Maybe both of you could talk without your son there so it will not make it hard on both of you and your son to "listen" in. This to, I am sure, will be hard on him as well. I hate to hear of any break-ups, so I can only wish you the BEST of LUCK and that things work out. Take Care.
...............................
A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (9 May 2007):
Why do you have to move out and not him?
Presumably your house has more than one bedroom. Tell him you'll give him his space but you're not leaving the house that belongs to both of you. If he has a problem with that then he can move out but since you're both equal owners then neither of you is obliged to.
I hope you sort out your problems and I believe communication is the key to that but in the short time a little space might be just what you both need.
CD
...............................
|