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female
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*illy
writes: Am I overreacting?My bf came to visit me recently and met my parents. However, due to our interracial relationship and culture difference, they did not get along. Instead of being concerned about the well being of me and the relationship between my parents and I, he called them vulgar names in front of me. To me this shows lack of respect towards me. Also my mother spent about $1000 during his stay, yet he did not thank her. In my culture, respect is a big part of life. I feel that if he cant respect my culture or try to understand it, he does not love me enough. Also he is mean on purpose. I once asked him for a souvenir since he was going on a trip. He said ok and asked for what I wanted. After the trip, he came back and told me that he didnt get anything for me because I asked for something. Is this how you treat someone you love? Should I try to make something out of this relationship or should I forget it? -Confused. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2006): I think you are aware of how you feel and you feel strongly about how to show respect and love.
Being with this man puts that in high conflict.
His actions and words are abusive and no one need tolerate such abuse.
And take any condescending remarks lightly.
Best of Luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2006): How can u possibly be confused about something like this? Really mindboggles me. You said:
- lack of respect towards your parents who forked out a grand to pay for his expenses
- is a total jerk for being so petty
- possibly many other similar negatives
SO which part are you confused about?
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2006): obviously leave him to it.try for better x
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (18 July 2006):
 Why would you condemn yourself to a loveless relationship with a man who shows a terrible lack of respect for your culture and who plays head games with you?
I wouldn't waste another minute with him. The showdown with your parents would have been the first and last straw for me. Even a young boy on his first date knows that you need to be respectful and friendly with your girl's parents!
Don't wait until he's shredded your self-confidence and left you a shuddering wreck... take a shortcut and leave him now.
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female
reader, sxyredhdnc +, writes (18 July 2006):
 dump him honey! If he has that much disrespect for your family and you too it seems then he isn't worth your time.I would never date someone who is disrespectful to my family and me.if he loved you your request for a gift would have been met and not looked on as a demand which sounds like that is what he thought.he's not right for you get out while you can.Good luck
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