A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys,well My best friend wants me to go out with her cousin, he really likes me and we've been friends for a long time. I know he likes me but i dont like him more than a friend however she's my best friend and i dont want to hurt his or her feelings by turning him down.My best friends family all think im great as well and when they found out that he liked me they were all assuming straight away that i would go out with him and that we would be the perfect couple.The truth is i dont find him attractive at all, hes really lovely and got a really nice personality and to be honest if i thought he was attractive he would be the perfect guy.He has told his mother that i have agreed to go on a date with him, when all i said was that i would have lunch as FRIENDS (i mentioned the friends part honest) well his mother has not told my Best friends mother who is really happy because she treats me like her other daughter and wants me to be happy and my best friend is really happy because she thinks im going to date her cousin.I dont know what to do now :S i dont want to make him look like a liar because hes really sweet and hes a good friend and i wouldnt like to do that to him, i cant tell my best friend that i dont like him because she'll ask why and i'll be lost for words, and i dont want to make anyone annoyed, im thinking about just going on a date with him but then i dont want him to think that where going out or something because the last thing i want to do is string him along. please help :(
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male
reader, Marky.T +, writes (26 November 2009):
Owch owch owch your stuck between a rock and a hard place aint you. lets talk about the liar part, it may just be a case of chinnese wispers he may have said to is mom that you guys are going to lunch and in her over excitedness over reacted or read the wrong messages from there convosation. tho on the other hand he could have lied in anticpation of a cinimatic ending where he walks home with the girl where he has in mind set what will happen and as your good mates hes 100% sure what the out come will be. alot of guys do this i can vouch for about 85% of the male popuation that they do that its just a fact of life.(that mini essay was just something for you to think about) but now we should think of a way out of this for you ... it seems to me that the reason your in this situation is because you havnt comunicated with him or your best freind. talk to your best freind if you guys are tite then she should understand its in some ways is a no brainer tell her that hes just not right say that hes too much of a mate to be a bf and if she ask why and ect ect ect ect ect say you dont feel atracted to him in anyway and that beacuse of that you dont feel like long lasting relation ship would work and also tell her how you feel traped into a corner by the fact that you have presure from various mommys and her.now the whole luch/ make belive date you can either back out by finding one reason or anouther but in some ways that could be a bit harsh or you could go on the date make him know thought body langauge that your not intresting and dont lead him on in anyway (im not saying your one of thos poeple casue your most likely not but im just say something to think about) and dont stress and enjoy your self nothing has to come of it as long as you dont want to and if in a emergancy and he pop the will you be my girl freind question just say no and say the whole your to much of a mate thing
and for now alfter that essay i can surly say my fingers hurt but you should be fine good luck with it and i hope it all works for you drop me a mail with some feed back in it thanks
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