A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi I'm 16 and I have a guy friend who I joke with a call my best friend. Well he knows me better than other people and we used to be close till he got a girlfriend who hates that I'm his "best friend". Last year december me and my best friend (bf) made a bet that if I won the game of pool I'd get sushi and if he won he would get to have sex with me, well I lost but thought he was joking, time passed and he kept on about this bet but me still thinking it was a big joke went along with it, until today. I invited him to my house as I usually do when home alone, we usually just talk about him, his gf and the guys I like but today inbetween my convosation starters he kept saying, "have sex with me" "I have condoms" and "can I hump u naked". Me still thinking its a joke just laughed it off and said no, then he started to pick me up and forced me on my bed, I was laughing until he pulled out his hard penis and said "I won the bet" I still said no but I was angry this time and said I wasn't in the mode so he tried to "put me in the mood" but forcing himself onto of me and kissing me. It took all my strength to push him off while telling him that this was turning into rape, then I threatened to tell his girlfriend what he had done if he didnt leave now. I'm really freaked out because he never acts so forward, ever, he is an introvert! Now I dnt know what to do or who to tell, please help me.
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female
reader, Candid Cally  +, writes (16 November 2011):
Do not place yourself in a situation alone with him ever again.
Tell his girlfriend.
Tell a parent or a school counselor.
Tell someone who cares about you.
Tell that idiot boy that the bet was NOT serious and buying sushi for someone is completely different than having sex.
Tell his parents what he tried to do to you.
A
female
reader, Candid Cally +, writes (16 November 2011):
Do not place yourself in a situation alone with him ever again.
Tell his girlfriend.
Tell a parent or a school counselor.
Tell someone who cares about you.
Tell that idiot boy that the bet was NOT serious and buying sushi for someone is completely different than having sex.
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A
female
reader, champagne69  +, writes (16 November 2011):
I very similar situation happened between me and my ex when I was 16/17, we'd been together 9 months but I should have ended things much earlier, I was not interested him at all, he was a foul, unnattractive, rude, self obsessed asshole. He used to also force himself onto me, by giving me oral etc when I always said no, I am very shy, very small thin build, so he always thought I was just 'joking' or if I tried to move him away, he had the strength to just push me down. That didn't bother me so much, it does now, but at the time it just frustrated me. I was so stupid to not see the characteristics he had of forcing me into things at the time and after what I experienced I'm so angry at myself for not realising something like that could happen, no girl should have to go through with it, it's an awful feeling huh?Anyways we were both virgins, and luckily my mum was strict and we weren't allowed to stay over each others houses. Mum was away though for a weekend, and he ran over to my house late at night, it was alright, this was at the end of the relationship where for months I'd be looking for a way out or pushing him away hoping he'd break up with me but he was clueless.Anyways he slowly had stripped me down to underwear - he'd always take my clothes off, never fully naked though still had undies on always, I'd try stop him from taking any of my clothes off but he was bigger and strong. He then did something out of the usual for him and fully stripped himself down, he normally also left his underwear on - but no, penis out and everything I was very scared. He then pretty much ripped my underwear off, I was holding it as tight as I said yelling no but he ripped it OUT OF MY HANDS AND OFF ME, got on top of me, he was a big guy, not tall but a lot of muscle and body fat at that stage and he was about twice my body weight as I am so small - he was whispering in my ear 'lets do it, you know you want to' and I just kept saying over and over again 'no i don't want to get off me' and for five or so minutes he was forcing himself on top of me, grinding me SO hard, and he was grunting and just saying over and over 'you know you want it baby' or something similar and I was squirming, trying to force him off it, you could have heard the tears in my eyes of me asking him to stop, I eventually managed to move myself underneath him and get out, he then grabbed my hand dragged me into the shower to shower with him as it was one of his little 'fantasies', but I left, got dressed, went to bed and told him to leave.I finally got the courage to break up with him after that, I could never look at him the same, things could never be the same, out of the few I've told this to they've even classified that as rape, only part is that he never penetrated me so I guess he sexually assualted me.So my advice to you, be scared, if it's in his behaviour to be like that he could do it again, so I would stay away from him completely, especially seeming as he still 'won the bet' and you still 'owe him sex'. You should also tell his girlfriend, hopefully she will listen to you, but you don't want him doing the same thing to her or anyone else. I don't think you will ever be able to look at him the same, or feel comfortable alone with him again, so please if you've lost the friendship, let it go, he doesn't deserve to have anything to do with you. If this does happen to upset you talk to close friends and family about it - I've never told my family as I know they will personally hunt him down and kill them theirselves, but it's been over a year since it happened to me and it's troubling me now more so than when it happened, brings your self worth down. So if you ever feel alone or upset in any way over this, talk to people, let it out, and if it troubles you in the long run, go see a proffessional.Just whatever you do please don't continue to see this boy, he may not act this way normally, but this is in his behaviour, this is how he is.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2011): I strongly advise you to remove this guy from your life. He is dangerous, obviously mentally disturbed. You say he is an introvert but there is a lot going on inside of him and you never know when he is going to snap.
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 This is attempted rape. The guy is a rapist and one day he will hurt someone badly. Tell your parents. Don't talk to the guy, don't have anything to do with him. If he comes near you again SCREAM RAPIST.. YOU DIRTY RAPIST...
I would love you to tell his girlfriend, I'm worried about her safety. But, most times women don't believe other women, they don't believe their boyfriend can do anything wrong.
That guy is scum, if he had the chance he would force you to have sex. He doesn't care about anything except his penis. Do not go near him again. He is very dangerous. They say the introverted ones are the worst, this isn't a mistake, he wasn't drunk or anything, he just wanted sex and he didn't care if you didn't. He's a bloody pig...
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (16 November 2011):
 First of all, well done for finding the strength to push him off of you and tell him how it is!!!
I think you should tell his gf to be honest. Tell her about how he forced himself on you even though you said no. Tell her that you don't want something similar happening to her!! She'll be angry, but he crossed a line with you and your friendship will never be the same again!
Good luck, be strong :)
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