A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My best friend is like a sister to me, and we have been close for nearly 20 years. She got married 4 years ago to who seemed to be the world's most perfect man. She recently disclosed that she has been hiding the fact that she is really unhappy in her marriage, and confided that her husband is a drug addict and that no matter what she does he can't stop. She had a miscarriage 2 years ago, and the docs told her it was because there was an abnormality with the baby, but she researched into the problem and found it was directly related to her husbands cannabis use, causing major defects to the baby. She is so unhappy, but is scared to tell anyone or her parents, as in our culture it is very taboo to be divorced. I really don't know how to help her! He refuses to realise that he has a problem, and would never go for drug counselling or seek professional help. I really don't know how to help her! Any suggestions please?! x x x
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female
reader, Serinity  +, writes (7 January 2008):
 Thank you sweetie. I hope it helps! Take care as well.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello Serenity,
Thank you so so so much for your reply and for your information and help. I really hope things turn out better for you too, and you should be really proud of the fact that you are able to help others in the same predicament as you, and that you can make a difference to other peoples lives. Thank you so much x Take care x
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A
female
reader, Serinity +, writes (4 January 2008):
ALANON is a counseling group for people (mainly spouses) who are dealing with alcoholics/drug addicts. There are several ALANON web sites that you can check out that give you much more information. Just google the word ALANON. You can also find meetings in your/her area. I highly recommend it. I am married to an alcoholic/drug addict myself and ALANON really helped me realize a lot about addictions that I had no idea about. It also gave me the strength I needed to get back on my feet and be firm with him if he wanted to save his marriage & family. I hope it helps. Best wishes and God bless!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Serenity. Thanks so much for your advice and for taking time out to read about the horrible situation my friend is in. I am so sorry and don't want to sound totally dopey, but am not quite sure what ALANON is? Is it some sort of Drug counselling? Thanks so so much x xx
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A
female
reader, Serinity +, writes (3 January 2008):
Recommend ALANON to her. It will help her to see things that she is not aware of and give her the strength and support she needs to move on with her life, with or without him. It will help her deal with her emotions and rebuild her self esteem. She deserves better and if he's not willing to get the help that he needs then she needs to get help for herself. Being married to a drug addict will break you down and make you miserable and (if she doesn't already) she will eventually resent him. She will come to realize that he is chosing drugs over her, how comforting is that? Really, if she means that much to you, please, try to get her to go to some ALANON meetings, go with her. She'll find strength that she never knew she had. Good luck and God bless!
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